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WRESTLING COLUMNS

Rachel G. Runs Down The Summerslam Card
August 25, 2003 by Rachel G. of Chattanooga TN


To open this I would like to convey there's are only my opinion's or true facts about the matches. For once we actually met the Spanish announce team and heard them say more than five words. Which I think is new and different to see the men behind the infamous table that never lasts the whole show.

Red White and Screwed

To open this on the first match which lasted seven minutes and fifty seconds. La Resistance vs. The Dudley Boys, and just for record the Dudley Boys had held the tag teams championship 16 times in three companies. All was well and the match was going well and I was really enjoying all of this. Then the ball dropped and a camera man came into the ring and hit Devon in the head with his camera. Let it be known that the camera man was also the man dressed as an Air Force enlisted man on Raw. (but he can get in trouble for pretending to be in the military) The Dudley's had the match won up until that point. La Resistance took the win in common cheating fashion. Oh wait isn't that how they usually win.

Derailing the Train

Next on our list was the Undertaker vs. A-Train which lasted nine minutes twenty-two seconds. This match was good (of course I am a huge Taker fan) A-Train gave it his all and still fell short. I mean look two minutes and thirty seconds into the match Undertaker brought out the old school. Come on now we can't make it that easy for a second or two you actually thought A-Train was going to take the win. Not at this show. But I am not done after the win, Undertaker took advantage of the moment and went after A-Train and Sable thought she had the balls to enter the ring and go after Undertaker. Well that was not ment to be because out came Stephy. She wanted to get her hands on Sable which I enjoyed more then just about anything.

Did he say government mule""

Next we hit the big old match brought on by some the lamest lines I have heard in a while, but it did turn out one of the best matches due to the fact that before it was over there was a shoot fight. First off where in the world does Coachmen have any right getting involved in the ring. Well he got his just deserts. Now here to set the record..... this is a direct quote from the show Eric said " He built WCW from the ground up." now to set the record straight. Jim Crocket Promotions built NWA/WCW till it phased into just WCW. Ted Turner and Eric Bischoff destroyed WCW. Now to the shoot fight and Austin. I thought that the physical contact that Austin received was just what we needed to see. But the best was Eric being landed on and going through the table thanks to a flying mac-o-tack.

WWE suffers from Hart burn!!

Now we hit the Four way match. Now this match in my opinion was not right nor was it just. Where do the writers of WWE feel that Guerrero needs to have the title, he did wrestle with some great wrestlers who deserve the chance. We want someone that will be enjoyable to watch. Beniot and Rhyno both have what it takes to be a champion but again the writers have no consideration for these guys. Could this be maybe because Beniot trained in the Hart dungeon and the WWE is suffering from Hart burn" Now I can say this much, that is the win tonight was not stolen was not cheated and he didn't lie to win the match. Good job Guerrero for that at least. But the win was tainted. Match lasted twelve minutes and forty seconds.

Menu tonight Angle lock Brock

Now the US title match was interesting and I was expecting to see more blood from the Manster. I am glad that Kurt didn't get hurt any worse then just bangs and bumps. Now when it comes to real wrestling I think the match would have been great but the match ended with a great finish. Now for the chair and the man named Vince. Well all I can say is Happy Birthday Vince you got what you deserved in the best way possible. But I do believe that he may have also got hurt in the process. I have Never seen a chair collapse like that. Also this was the longest match in the show lasting twenty-one minutes and twenty seconds.

Rope a dope and win a match

To Kane and Van Dam interesting match due to the fact that Kane lost his footing and then went to do the move again and completely missed Rob. Now for entertainment value this was good but not great. I always enjoy seeing either Kane or Rob in the ring to entertain us but tonight was just different. It may have been just the whole story line that went along with this all but I didn't feel the match. This match lasted thirteen minutes flat.

I want a refund

For the biggest match of the night which was also the biggest let down. Lets see the match lasted a whopping nineteen minutes and twelve seconds. Well I feel let down because of the fact of all the hype. I wanted to see this match break out and let Randy Orton and Kevin Nash have some real Compition but it didn't. I think that was a punk way to have the match end. With the all too well known sledge hammer and Triple H with an easy win. Now when it comes to get moves of the match I loved the sweet chin music that Triple H received that sent him back to his isolation chamber where he sat till the rest of the Compition was taken out of the match, by Kevin Nash with Goldberg getting three easy pins. Then after all this is said and done he comes out gets ruffed up a bit by Goldberg. Even now he has to have a sledge hammer to win a match that was rightfully Goldbergs match .

Novelty or not

During Sunday Night Heat before the PPV aired Matt Hardy has went above and beyond stupid, he claims that a now injured Zack Gowen is only a novelty act. Is this the way you deal with fear Matt or are you jealous of what he might be able to do to you. He claimed a win by forfeit.

So to close my long and drawn out opinions, which I know not all agree with I just had to have them heard.

What is going to happen with the special matches in the WWE" Right now we have the elimination chamber match. The first was record breaking and monumental not to mention entertaining. The second one from tonight's Summer Slam was a joke; like all re-runs of new and innovative matches.

Lets run through a few of the past monumental specialty matches, (all of which include or was originated for the Undertaker). The Casket match - The first was unheard of and quite enjoyable, the next one was a joke on wheels with 20 superstars taking turns and attacking 'Taker, then he appears on the titantron like he has been put to rest. How lame" Now we move to the Buried alive matches that started a great long running feud with the Undertaker and Mankind. Once again awesome match actually burying someČ one alive! Then they started going down hill and the powers that be who created this match should have been placed in the tomb and covered for good. The only good that came from the last buried alive match was that it was the last PPV for the late, great Terry Gordy (The Fabulous Freebirds) as the Executioner. Now we move a few years later with the Hell in the Cell matches. The first was with the Undertaker vs. Shawn Michael's. It was a great match due to it was the introduction of Kane and there was a lot of blood shed. Next was the infamous, Undertaker and Mankind put PPV and specialty matches at an all time high and set the bar for future matches. But now even the Hell in the Cell matches are a joke. I really thought that Vince and Eric had really come up with someČ thing special with the elimination chamber match. Once again the fans have been fooled by the WWE. What will be next for the e.c. matches a new record for how fast a match can go"

by Rachel G.


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