HeadLocker — Jay Shannon
The Monday Night War Analysis for April 5, 2010
Our resident philosopher, Jay Shannon, compares the two forces on Monday nights, grades them on several categories and picks a weekly winner.
The next skirmish in the Monday Night Wars seemed like a minor disagreement, as composed to a full-out war. Let’s take a look.
Raw offered a “Diva, Red-Carpet, Dressed to Impress Battle Royal”. The Divas came out in Evening Gowns and tossed eavh other around for about five minutes. The Winner, Eve, gets a title shot, next week, against Maryse. Over on TNA, there was an 8-Knockout, Elimination Tag Team battle. The four winners got a key to a lockbox. Inside the lockbox were: The Knockout Title, Poison, the Spider, a open contract and a forced striptease.
Tara won back her spider. Angelina Love became the new Knockout Champ, Velvet Sky got a future match (a Leather and Lace Match against Love, next week) and Daffney had to do a Strip Tease. Dafney didn’t really get naked, as she was aattacked by Lacey Von Erich. Darn it.
Raw had Sheamus start to diss on HHH. HHH came out and brought back his sledge hammer to counter Sheamus’ steel pipe. Ted DiBiase, Jr. talked about how his daddy gave him a Trust Fund and the Million Dollar Belt. TNA offered Matt Morgan talking in multiple person for himself as “We”. Christy Hemme and JB talked with a few people but it was rather bland.
On TNA, Hogan unveiled RVD and Jeff Hardy as the final two members of his Team Hogan grouping for Lockdowwn On Raw, Jack Swagger came out to brag about winning the World title. John Cena came out to challenge Swagger, putting his WWE title up for grabs. Randy Orton then came out to challenge Swagger. Big Show and Miz came out to tell Cena and Orton to quit hogging the spotlight. Raw’s intro was much more chaotic than TNAs.
Raw had the two Unified Tag Team Battles plus the return of the sledge. TNA had the Lockbox Challenge and the next appearance of Orlando Jordan, as well as Shannon Moore rushing the ring to challenge Douglas Williams for the X-Title at Lockdown.The Band also jumped Team 3D and The Motor City Machine Guns for no apparent reason.
Raw: DiBiase defeated Christian. Sheamus trashed Kofi Kingston, Randy Orton R-K-O’d Jack Swagger.
TNA: RVD won over James Storm, “The Freak” Rob Terry retained his Global title with a squash win over Homicide, Team 3D and the Motor City Machine Guns went to a No Contest, Douglas Williams won a Gauntlet Match against Generaion Me, Mr. Anderson beat Kurt Angle in a sick Ladder Match
TNA: D’Angelo Dinero defeated Desmond Wolfe in a rematch from last week.
Raw: John Cena lost to Big and Awesome, twice. First, Batista walked out on him and Cena got counted out going after Batista. Then, David Otunga put himself as Cena’s partner for another match. Otunga bailed on Cena and Show popped Cena in the skull and took the match
TNA: The Lockbox Challenge was different and unique. It offered a new way for a a title to change hands. Williams’ mini-Gauntlet was something I had never seen before.
RAW: Raw had a boring Guest Host. The matches were all pretty standard. Raw really didn’t offer much new and innovative, other than the Evening Gown Battle Royal.
Final Winner for the Week of April 5, 2010: TNA
Final Thoughts: David Otunga was a poor choice for Guest Host. Maybe it’s time to retire the lame format of bringing in a “celebrity” to run the show. TNA did run a few interesting new concepts but threw a lot of Hogan and Flair moments. At least ther was no Eric Bischoff to have to deal with. I actually was bored with Raw, while TNA kept my attention from start to finish. TNA also started an hour earlier, giving them the opening jump on Raw. TNA would be well-served to continue that trend. A lot of people might not want to switch stations if TNA offered a lot of good stuff to build into hour two.