WWE RAW RESULTS
March 31, 2003|
Announcers: Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler
- HEAT TAPINGS:
- Buddy Wayne b Tim Flowers (dark match)..
- Rodney Mack defeated Spike Dudley..
- Trish Stratus defeated Ivory to retain the Women's title..
- Christian defeated Tommy Dreamer..
- RAW KICKS OFF:
- Video package of all the action from last night's Wrestlemania spectacular!
- Backstage, the Rock yells at a make-up guy for trying to fix his face..
- ~~~Rock says that tonight is Rock appreciation night in Seattle!
- IN THE RING: Steve Austin + Eric Bischoff..
- Austin says that he's always been very very honest since being in the WWE..
- Austin says that last night The Rock was the better man, and Stone Cold got his ass whipped..
- Austin says that just cause Rock was the better man last night, doesn't mean he will tonight!
- Austin calls out the Rock, saying he would like to shake his hand and appreciate him..
- Instead, Eric Bischoff comes out to the stage..
- Bischoff says Austin is a vengeful bastard and wants to do more than shake Rock's hand..
- Bischoff says that he knows what Austin is trying to hide..
- Bischoff says that Austin spent the night before Wrestlemania in the hospital..
- Bischoff says his lawyers found out that there is a lot "wrong" with Steve Austin..
- Bischoff says that Austin's doctors said that his spinal cord is "all screwed up"..
- Austin says he doesn't appreciate Bischoff digging up his personal information..
- Austin invites Bischoff to the ring so he can tell this to his face..
- Bischoff stays on the stage..
- Austin says that if he wants to raise hell and Bischoff nor the doctors can do anything about it..
- Bischoff says that Austin is a liability to the WWE..
- Bischoff says that Austin's position has been terminated, in other words, he's fired!
- Austin says that Bischoff can't fire him!
- Bischoff says that a fed-ex copy of the termination notice is on its way to Austin's home..
- WORLD (NON-TITLE) MATCH: Triple H vs Hurricane..
- Hurricane comes out and gives a kid in the front row one of his hurrimasks..
- Ric Flair went behind him and ripped the mask right off the kid's face and stomped it!
- Hurricane came to the rescue and got a few shots on Flair before the match started..
- Triple H eventually wins (big shocker) after hitting the pedigree on Hurricane..
- BACKSTAGE: Kane & Rob Van Dam..
- Kane says that it's better of they go their separate ways..
- Rob Van Dam says they could do that, but he just got them another title shot tonight!
- Rob Vam Dam said that all he had to do was agree to join Bischoff's administration if they lost..
- Kane got upset that RVD would sign them up for that without asking him first!
- MATCH: Scott Steiner vs Christopher Nowinski..
- Chris comes out with a plastic mask to protect an injury sustained to his face..
- Chris politely asks Scott Steiner to 'take it easy on the face'..
- Scott threatens to do more damage to Nowinski, who tries to run away, but Steiner catches him..
- Scott Steiner beats the living hell out of Chris Nowinski, who taps out to the Steiner recliner..
- INTERVIEW: Terri & Steve Austin..
- Terri asks Austin if what Bischoff said was true?
- Steve Austin says that yes, his neck sucks, and that he's fired so it doesn't matter..
- Terri finishes the interview with teary eyes and walks off..
- ROCK APPRECIATION MOMENT: The Rock concert..
- BACKSTAGE: The Dudley Boyz + Chief Morely & Lance Storm..
- Bubba is explaining to DVon that he helped Lance Storm because he was saving their jobs!
- DVon says that Chief Morely is crazy, and power hungry, and doesn't like him!
- Bubba agrees that it sucks, but they have to play along for a while..
- Morely & Storm enter and say that there will be a three team elimination match tonight..
- Morely says that the four of them will get rid of RVD/Kane, then lay down for Morely/Storm..
- BACKSTAGE: Booker T & Ric Flair..
- Booker T is getting his knee wrapped by medical personell when Ric Flair comes in and taunts him..
- Booker gets up and grabs Flair and tells him to never stick his nose in his business again!!
- MATCH: Maven vs Rosey w/Rico..
- Editor's Note: Rosey is the worst wrestler ever in WWE history..
- Maven gets the upset victory with the schoolboy pinfall..
- FEATURE: Jerry "the King" Lawler..
- Jerry Lawler got to be celebrity photographer for a Playboy photo shoot..
- Editor's Note: FARQING STOP MIXING MY WRESTLING WITH PORN!!!!!
- IN THE RING: Chris Jericho + Booker T..
- Jericho says that he had one of the best matches of his career last night, and thanks HBK..
- Jericho says that HBK should thank him, because he brought out the best in him..
- Jericho says that he out-performed Michaels last night, and deserved to win the match..
- Jericho says that he is going to take his frustrations out on Booker T tonight..
- Suddenly, Booker T comes out and cuts Jericho off..
- MATCH: Chris Jericho vs Booker T..
- Late in the match, Ric Flair runs down and attacks Booker T causing a disqualification..
- Triple H comes down as well, and he, Flair and Jericho triple team Booker..
- Triple H hits Booker with a Pedigree, and Flair puts the figure four on him!
- Shawn Michaels comes down and makes the save and clears the ring..
- Jericho jumps Michaels and he, Triple H & Ric Flair start beating HIM up now..
- Jericho puts the Walls of Jericho on Michaels..
- Booker T comes back in and tries to help but can't..
- Triple H puts the Indian Death Lock on Booker T..
- Ric Flair stomps away at Booker & Michaels as we go to commercial..
- MATCH: Stevie Richards w/Victoria vs Jeff Hardy..
- Victoria holds Jeff's leg, preventing him from climbing the top rope..
- Trish runs down and delivers the "chick kick" to Victoria..
- Jeff hits the swanton bomb on Steven Richards for the win..
- Jeff & Trish have a special moment giving eachother puppy dog eyes but no smooches this week..
- Editor's Note: Jeff Hardy is so gay, he can't even make a Trish infatuation look real..
- PARKING LOT: Steve Austin..
- Steve Austin shakes the hand of a group of RAW crew members who bid him farewell..
- Steve walks up the ramp into the darkness..
- ROCK APPRECIATION MOMENT: Finally the Rock has come back to -insert your city-..
- BACKSTAGE: Test & Stacy Keibler + Goldust..
- Stacy walks in on Test, who is talking on the phone, complimenting the person on their "spread"..
- Stacy innocently asks who he was talking to and Test gets extremely defensive!
- Test tries to get Goldust to back him up, but Goldust spazzes out and tells Stacy the truth!
- BACKSTAGE: The Rock..
- The Rock is looking for Steve Austin backstage and sees all the crew members looking sad..
- The Rock tells them to cheer up cause he needs them to set up for the Rock appreciation night..
- The Rock that after the show, they're all going to a big party with the Rock!
- The Rock promises PIE all night long, and that makes them all happy :)
- TRIPLE ELIMINATION TAG TITLE MATCH: Chief Morely/Lance Storm vs The Dudley Boyz vs RVD/Kane..
- Late in the match, Bubba holds RVD for Morely, who lines up for a chairshot..
- DVon comes in and pulls the chair away from Morely!
- DVon swings at Morely, but Bubba tackles Morely, saving him from getting a chairshot?!
- Rob Van Dam attacks DVon and gets the pinfall to eliminate the Dudleyz!!
- A few minutes later, Kane nails a chokeslam on Morely, and RVD hits a frog splash to win!
- Kane & Rob Van Dam are your new World Tag Team champions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- BACKSTAGE: Eric Bischoff..
- Bischoff says that if we thought Austin's firing was shocking, to stay tuned for something bigger..
- Bischoff says that the ink on this contract isn't even dry yet!
- ROCK APPRECIATION CEREMONY: The Rock + Goldberg..
- The Rock taunts the crowd until they begin to chant "You Suck! You Suck!" -- and that's a shoot fans..
- The Rock says that he thinks that it absolutely sucks that Steve Austin was fired!
- The Rock says that he has nothing but much love and much respect for Steve Austin..
- The Rock says that he knows Steve Austin didn't wanna go out the way he did (3 Rock Bottoms)..
- The crowd then chants "Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!" and wins the "Most Gullable Audience" award..
- The Rock shows footage on the big screen of his life and wrestling career..
- The crowd then tries to look smark and chants "Goldberg! Goldberg! Goldberg!"..
- The Rock says that he's done everything he's wanted to do in wrestling, so NOW it's over..
- The Rock says that the fans don't appreciate the Rock, and they can kiss the people's ass!
- Goldberg arrives..
- Goldberg comes out to the same music, same pyro and same cocky swagger from WCW..
- Goldberg & Rock circle around the ring taunting eachother..
- The crowd chants "Goooldberg! Gooooooooldberg! Gooooldberg!" like a bunch of marks..
- Goldberg asks if The Rock wants to know who's next?
- Goldberg then informs the Rock that HE'S NEXT!
- Goldberg spears the hell out of the Rock and leaves the ring!!
- And that's a wrap folks...
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