TNA IMPACT Wrestling
Location: Orlando, FL
Date: December 27, 2012
Commentators: Todd Keneley, Mike Tenay, and Taz
We look back at the last several weeks as Aces & Eights targeted Kurt Angle and got involved in last week’s World Title match between Jeff Hardy and Austin Aries, which ended because of interference from Bobby Roode.
Bully Ray starts the show off by saying it’s no secret that he and Hulk Hogan don’t get along, but he wants to know what it’ll take to earn Hogan’s trust. He has nothing but respect for Hogan, but he wants to call him out here, not to fight, but to talk. Hogan’s music hits, but Brooke comes out to the ring instead and tells Bubba that her father isn’t here. She tells “Mark” that he knows, Bubba asks how he knows and she says she’s not sure, but she says this isn’t where to settle it. She says they need to talk to Hulk privately so she can show her dad that Bubba’s the man she knows he is. “Mark” steps out of the ring and walks off, Brooke comes after him to try and talk, but the annoying TNA cameramen won’t get out of their faces so they just walk off.
It’s Open Fight Night, and that means that any challenge has to be answered no matter what! Austin Aries comes out to the ring (apparently just missing Bubba and Brooke in the back on his way out) and says he’s going to make this short and sweet. Everyone saw that he had Hardy beat and that he should be the TNA World Champion right now, but the man he’s about to call out screwed him, and that’s Bobby Roode. Aries says he can’t be mad at him because he did the same thing to him and now they’re even. But tonight, they’re going to settle things in the ring like men and see who deserves to be the World Champion and who deserves to face Jeff Hardy for the title. They’re not going to do it right now because the only place Austin Aries and Bobby Roode should be wrestling is in the main event, and since this is the last main event of 2012, let’s take the two greatest wrestlers in the universe to determine who will take out Jeff Hardy once and for all. Great promo!
Samoa Joe comes out and says he came here to pick a fight, so since Aces & Eights likes to send someone out to hit people in the head with a hammer, he’s going to see how hard he hits face to face and calls out the big masked man from Aces & Eights so he can choke him out and take his mask off.
Samoa Joe vs ??????
Joe jumps the big man as soon as he gets in the ring, pummeling him with punches and kicks and nailing him with a leaping enziguiri. Joe goes for the mask, but the big man sticks his thumb in Joe’s eyes and runs him over with a clothesline. The big guy puts Joe over the middle rope and gives him the Boss Man Straddle for 2, then goes to a rear chinlock. Joe escapes and dodges a charge, then sits the big man on the top rope and goes for the Muscle Buster. The big guy blocks, but Joe hits a Manhattan drop, a running big boot, and a back senton. Joe gets the rear naked choke right in the middle of the ring and the big man goes out.
Winner: Samoa Joe
Joe motions that he’s going to take the hood off, but the rest of the gang runs in and Joe hits the bricks. Aces & Eights makes angry faces at Joe as he backs his way up the ramp.
Robbie E and Robbie T are backstage and they get into a confrontation with Jesse Godderz. Robbie E says that since tonight is Open Fight Night, they should have a Bro Off. Okay.
Kenny King is backstage telling Christian York that he’s impressed with the way he came in and took it to everyone because it’s so much like the way he came in. He knows Rob Van Dam is going to call someone tough out tonight, so he tells Christian to watch and take notes. King walks off and York shakes his head and wonders where they find these guys.
Robbie E and Robbie T come out to the ring where E tells us that it’s Open Bro Night, and he’s calling out the fake Robbie E, Jesse Godderz. He tells Jesse to get out here so he can show him what it’s like to be a real bro. Jesse comes out and tells E that he can refer to him as Mr Pectacular, but E reminds him that this is a Bro Off, and there’s three rules in a Bro Off: 1)it’s every Bro for himself, B)everything he does has to end in a bro. Since E is the Bro veteran, bro, he’s going to go first, bro, so he tells the DJ to hit his music, bro.
Bro Off: Robbie E vs Jesse Godderz
Robbie E’s music hits and he dances. E tells Jesse to top that, Bro. Jesse’s music hits and he does his Chris Masters posing routine while Tara drools and fondles him. Jesse tells E that this is how you Bro Off…dude. E says it wasn’t as bad as he thought it’d be, but there’s two problems: it’s bros not hos (meaning Tara), and number three is that Jesse is automatically disqualified because he ended with dude instead of bro, Bro. So the winner of the 2012 Bro Off is…wait a minute, Robbie T grabs the microphone and says there’s one more bro to go. T flexes to Jesse’s music, but then some new music hits and he does back rolls, one armed pushups, and pumps his fist at the crowd. Jesse and Robbie E’s jaws are on the ground as he takes the microphone out of E’s hand and goes “BRO!” T walks up the ramp as Jesse, Tara, and E stare at him in shock.
Winner: Robbie T
Rob Van Dam is backstage, and he’s…WALKING!
Rob Van Dam comes out to the ring and says that his efforts have obviously elevated the X Division, and this next X Division competitor is having everyone rave about his moves and his athleticism, so come on out to the ring…Christian York! We see backstage as King looks shocked that RVD didn’t pick him, and York does an in your face at King and comes out to the ring for…
X Division Title Match: Rob Van Dam vs Christian York
They go back and forth right off the bat with a fast paced exchange, RVD goes for the stepover leg lariat but York counters to a half nelson suplex. York hits a flying headscissors that sends RVD out to the floor, then quickly rolls him back inside and comes off the top rope with a missile dropkick. York hits a rolling neckbreaker on RVD for a close 2, RVD whips York to the corner and goes for the rolling monkey flip, but York drills him in the face with a knee to block the move and goes up top and hits a double stomp to the back of RVD for another close 2. RVD dodges a charging cannonball in the corner and counters a flying headscissors to a side suplex. York kicks out of a split legged moonsault at 2, but RVD follows up with a springboard thrust kick and then Rolling Thunder. RVD goes to the top rope and hits the five star notebook splash for the win.
Winner: Rob Van Dam
We go to the Aces & Eights clubhouse where Devon again says that the guy he has in mind tonight is a prima donna, but can be a big help to the group if they decide to bring him in. Doc comes in with a couple of girls and Devon asks him if he thinks they’ll do for tonight.
We then check in on Joseph Park’s progress at OVW where Park says he came from a long line of fighters like his brother Chris and his great grandfather Jebediah, who fought George Hackenschmidt in a bare knuckle fight and almost won. Danny Davis says he doesn’t want to crush anyone’s dream, but he sucked except when he got that nosebleed and went nuts last week. If he can channel that, he’s on to something because it got his attention.
Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian are at the merch stand seeing that they still have no merch there even though they have Kurt Angle shorts. The annoying cameraman asks them what their plan for tonight is, and they made their usual evasive answer before dumping AJ Styles’ t-shirts in the trash.
We look back at last week when Hulk Hogan told us to vote for TNA’s Wrestler of the Year, then Bobby Roode says that he knew Aries would call him out because he’s so predictible. He’s going to beat Aries and then go on to Genesis to beat Hardy for the title like he should have at Final Resolution.
By the way, Sting is coming back on 1-3-13 and he wants Doc!
Christopher Daniels comes out to the ring and says that he knows they told the fans that he and AJ Styles were doing it one last time at Final Resolution, but they really meant one last time until the next time. He gives the fans what they want, so he’s calling out AJ Styles! Frankie Kazarian comes out dressed like AJ Styles and does a dead on impersonation of him where he says he’d love to fight Daniels one more time, but he knows he can’t beat him. Daniels beat him with his own Styles Clash, and he’s just some dumb hick from Georgia and Daniels is from Cali-frickin’-fornia. This has been the worst frickin’ year of his life, so he’s going to go find Claire Lynch, but Daniels interrupts him and says that nobody wants to see that. He apologizes to the fans for not giving them Styles vs Daniels one second last time, but they can feel free to worship them now. Chavo Guerrero Jr and Hernandez come out and say they can make fun of people having a bad 2012, but Chavo and Hernandez had a pretty good 2012 since they beat them for the TNA World Tag Team Title. They’re going to finish 2012 with their foot up Daniels and Kazarian’s rears. They enter the ring, the bell rings, and we’re off!
TNA World Tag Team Title Champions Chavo Guerrero Jr & Hernandez vs Bad Influence
The champions tear right through Daniels and Kazarian, with Hernandez hitting a splash on Kazarian for 2. Daniels tags in and he gets ping ponged between the champions before Hernenadez pops him up into an overhead release suplex. Daniels is in the wrong part of town as Chavo stomps him down and Hernandez chokes him from the floor. Hernandez comes in and hits a splash in the corner on Daniels and then backdrops him almost to the moon. Daniels begs for mercy as we go to commercial.
We’re back and Chavo is dumping AJ…er, I mean Kazarian to the floor as Hernandez has Daniels up in a really long delayed vertical suplex. Hernandez tackles Kazarian off the apron and then clotheslines Daniels out to the floor. He quickly rolls Daniels in and goes for a slingshot shoulderblock, but Kazarian pulls Daniels out of the way and Hernandez crashes and burns. Now Hernandez is in trouble and Bad Influence tag in and out while working the big man over. Daniels and Kazarian hit a series of double teams and repeatedly go after Chavo to draw him into the ring and prevent Hernandez from making a tag. Hernandez finally shoves Daniels across the ring and hits a Pounce to create some space and make a tag to Chavo, who comes in and cleans house on Kazarian. Chavo with a flying headscissors and a big monkey flip, followed by a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for 2. Chavo with his uncle’s Three Amigos on Kazarian, but Daniels and Kazarian hit a Hart Attack on Chavo for 2. Hernandez comes in and dumps both of them to the floor and the champions take them out with stereo dives, then Chavo rolls Kazarian inside and hits a slingshot rolling senton for 2. Kazarian goes for AJ’s springboard forearm, but Chavo dodges and hits a top rope frogsplash for the win.
Winners: Chavo Guerrero Jr & Hernandez
Jeff Hardy is backstage telling the cameraman that he has all the respect in the world for Aries and Roode in the ring, but no respect at all for them outside the ring. Revenge is coming real soon, but he’ll enjoy watching the two of them beat the hell out of each other tonight.
Gail Kim comes out and says she knows exactly who she’s calling out. 2012 was her year and she was the longest reigning Knockouts Champion until someone came along and scored a fluke victory. She’s ready to end that chapter and erase those memories before she regains her gold in 2013, and she’s calling out Miss Tessmacher.
Gail Kim vs Miss Tessmacher
Gail goes right after Brooke’s arm, but Tessmacher gets a quick jackknife rollup for 2, then dodges a charge in the corner and unloads with forearms and stomps in the corner. Brooke gives Gail a stinkface, then knocks her to the floor when Gail tries to roll to the apron to escape. Brooke rolls her right back in but gets caught with a DDT, then Gail hits a back suplex for 2. Brooke blocks a top rope Frankensteiner and she gets Gail in a hanging Dragon Sleeper on the top rope, then releases Gail and wipes her out with a top rope clothesline for 2. Gail catches Brooke with a boot to the face and whips her to the corner for the charging crossbody. Now Gail rubs her ass in Brooke’s face and goes for another back suplex, but Brooke converts it to a bulldog. Brooke nails Gail with a series of running clotheslines and forearms, then nearly turns Gail inside out with a Frankensteiner. She mounts Gail in the corner and goes “OH YEAH GAIL UH UH UH” while humping her face. What a sense of humor that Brooke has. Brooke hits an inverted bulldog and then goes to the top, but takes so long that I just know whatever she’s going to try won’t work. Indeed, Gail rolls out of the way of Brooke’s top rope elbowdrop and hits Sole Food for the win.
Winner: Gail Kim
Austin Aries is backstage, and he’s…WALKING! Bobby Roode is also backstage, and he’s…ALSO WALKING!
Bobby Roode vs Austin Aries
Roode takes Aries to the corner and tries a right hand, but Aries ducks out of the way. Aries says it’s cool, then they tie back up and do some mat wrestling. They end at a stalemate and Roode tries for a handshake, Aries takes it and they both kick each other in the gut. Roode hits the ropes and Aries tries a leapfrog but appears to hurt his knee. Roode says he’s not buying this crap, and he kicks Aries in the knee and tries a spinning toehold. Aries kicks Roode off to the floor, dances around to show that the knee is fine, and he gets ready to try a dive to the floor, but Roode pops back in the ring and they go nose to nose. We go to commercial, but not before we go INSIDE JEFF HARDY’S HEAD!!! He’s at ringside surrounded by animals (as he says) as he watches two men who don’t deserve to challenge for the World Title.
We’re back, and Roode and Aries are trading back rakes until Roode gets a vertical suplex. Aries dodges a kneedrop and then dropkicks Roode’s knee out from under him. Roode dodges an elbowdrop, and this match is so even that I just know they’re going to do some kind of draw and make it a three way at the PPV. Roode goes for a superplex, but Aries blocks and they box each other’s ears repeatedly on the top rope, then thumb each other in the eyes before going back to boxing their ears. Aries finally gets three ear boxes in a row to knock Roode off the top, but Roode dodges a missile dropkick and tries a spear. Aries sees him coming and hooks him into the Last Chancery, but Roode goes to the eyes to escape and gets Aries in a Crippler Crossface. Aries goes to Roode’s eyes to get out and they trade punches and chops, Roode begs for mercy and tries a rollup with his feet on the ropes. The referee sees and stops the count, and Roode takes too long arguing with the referee and allows Aries to roll Roode up with a handful of tights. The referee sees again and stops the count, and Roode hits a spinebuster for 2. Roode tries to use a chair on Aries, but the referee takes it away and opens Roode up to a roaring forearm from Aries that gets 2. Now Aries gets the chair and the referee takes it away, so the referee finally has enough and loses his mind yelling at both men that he’s sick of this crap. Aries and Roode look at each other and then hit stereo kicks to the referee before dumping him out to the floor. They share a brief look of satisfaction before racing each other to the chair. Jeff Hardy’s music hits, and he comes in through the crowd and lays out both men. Hardy’s music is playing, so I guess we’ll call this…
Boy, can I call these things a mile away or what?