IN THE RING Vince McMahon + Undertaker + Shawn Michaels: Vince McMahon came out to the ring and talked about all the decisions he has made over the years (Inviting Bret back, kicking Bret in the gut, coming to Knoxville). Vince said that he banned Bret from the WWE for the fans. Before he could finish, Undertaker came out to the ring. Undertaker said that he was there in Montreal when it happened. He said that Vince had fear in his eyes then, and he has fear in his eyes now. Undertaker said that Vince was scared of the consequences of his actions. Undertaker finished by calling Vince a coward. Vince left the ring. Undertaker then talked about Shawn Michaels’ challenge for a rematch at WrestleMania. He said while Michaels proved that he was Mr. WrestleMania, he did not break his streak. He said that he wanted to come here to give Michaels his answer in person. Shawn Michaels comes out. Michaels said that he can’t wait to hear Undertaker’s answer. Undertaker said he has nothing to prove and his answer was NO. Undertaker said he is willing to have a match with Michaels tonight (which probably got the biggest pop of the night). Michaels said NO, that he wanted to face Undertaker at WrestleMania. Undertaker said the only way that Michaels will face him at WrestleMania is if he wins the Royal Rumble. Michaels said he will win the Royal Rumble and there isn’t going to be any mystery of which champion he is going to face. Michaels began to ask whether or not Undertaker would still be champion by WrestleMania, but Undertaker cut him off, saying that he will be the champion going into WrestleMania. They stare each other down.
NON (WWE CHAMPIONSHIP) TITLE MATCH WWE champion Sheamus defeated Evan Bourne: During the match, Randy Orton came out to watch. After the match, they have a stare down in the ring. Sheamus lifted his WWE title over his head and exited the ring.
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT Triple H & Shawn Michaels + Don Johnson + Carlito: Triple H & Shawn Michaels were talking about the Undertaker. HHH said he has something to tell Michaels. Before he can tell him what it is, guest host Don Johnson showed up. Both Shawn & HHH praised Don Johnson and kissed his butt. HHH said that he’ll tell him later and Michaels walked off. Don Johnson & Triple H talked about how late the other guest host, Jon Heder, was and how they don’t like him. HHH said that Don should host by himself. HHH walked off. Johnson saw someone that resembles Napoleon Dynamite and assumed it was Heder. Johnson walked up to him only to realize that it was Carlito. Johnson asked if he’s a fan of Napoleon Dynamite, and Carlito said he hasn’t heard of him and walks off.
IN THE RING Jack Swagger + Santino Marella + Mark Henry: Jack Swagger said that last week was a fluke. Swagger issued another challenge to Santino Marella. Santino came out in a white suit (I guess it’s supposed to be a reference to one of Don Johnson’s past roles). Santino said that he would love to face Swagger again, but being the president of the I.D.J.F.C. (Italian Don Johnson Fan Club) he has to meet Don Johnson. But Santino said he has a substitute. Mark Henry’s music hits and he made his way to the ring.
ALL AMERICAN, AMERICAN, AMERICAN OVER-THE-TOP-ROPE CHALLENGE Mark Henry defeated Jack Swagger:
IN THE PARKING LOT: A limo drove up to the arena. Jon Heder exited the car with the Bella Twins on his arms..
IN THE RING Don Johnson & Jon Heder + Mike “The Miz” Mizanin + Montel Vontavious Porter + The Big Show: Jon Heder & Don Johnson enter the ring. They ramble on about irrelevant crap and then Heder calls out his close friend, The Miz. The Miz comes out and thanks Heder for putting him in the Royal Rumble. The Miz goes on to taunt MVP. MVP comes out. He announces that he is in the Royal Rumble as well. He says that if he does anything that night, it will be eliminating The Miz. In fact, he says that he’ll throw out The Miz and Jon Heder right now. The Big Show comes out and takes out MVP. Heder says that he called Big Show just in case things got out of hand. He announces that the main event will be DX vs The Miz and Big Show.
TAG TEAM MATCH John Cena & Kofi Kingston defeated Legacy (Ted DiBiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes): After the match, Cody Rhodes walked to the back, leaving Ted DiBiase in the ring.
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT Jon Heder & The Big Show & Mike “The Miz” Mizanin + Hornswoggle & Triple H: Jon Heder, The Miz and Big Show were talking backstage. Big Show said he’s already getting along with The Miz better than his last partner (Chris Jericho, for those who don’t know). Hornswoggle and HHH come in. Big Show said he would love to get his hands on Hornswoggle. HHH suggested that they make the main event a six man tag match by adding Hornswoggle with DX and Heder with Miz & Big Show. Big Show and The Miz agreed, but Heder was not so thrilled.
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT Jon Heder + Don Johnson + Mike “The Miz” Mizanin & The Big Show: Jon Heder was nervous about the match and tried to get Johnson to fill in for him, but Don said he didn’t want any part of it. The Miz and Big Show come in and tell Heder to relax. They give him a robe and a ring name, “The Flame.”
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT Triple H & Vince McMahon + Shawn Michaels + Hornswoggle: Triple H talked to Vince McMahon about how he never lets things go (like Bret Hart). HHH said that Vince was backed into a corner and no matter what he does, he has to face the consequences. Vince walked away and Shawn Michaels came in. HHH said that there’s something he needs to tell Shawn. But before he can say it, Hornswoggle came in. HHH said he’ll tell him later.
SINGLES MATCH Randy Orton defeated “The Masterpiece” Chris Masters w/Eve Torres: During the match, WWE champion Sheamus came out to watch. Orton was distracted and ended up in the Masterlock, but miraculously escaped. After the match, Sheamus layed Orton out with a kick to the head.
SIX MAN TAG TEAM MATCH DX (Triple H & Shawn Michaels & Hornswoggle) defeated The Big Show & Mike “The Miz” Mizanin & The Flame (Jon Heder): After the match is over, Shawn Michaels said he will win the Royal Rumble, but then Cena comes out and says that he will win the Royal Rumble. Big Show got back in the ring and said that he will win the Royal Rumble. All three of them start to brawl. Cena threw Big Show over the top rope, Michaels tossed Cena outside, but then HHH threw Michaels out of the ring. HHH said that he’s been trying to tell Michaels this all night – that Michaels needs to find another way to face Undertaker, cause he (HHH) will win the Royal Rumble!