August 24, 2003 – Phoenix, Arizona
SUMMERSLAM QUICK & DIRTY:
Rey Mysterio defeated Shannon Moore (HEAT);
La Resistance defeated The Dudleyz;
The Undertaker defeated A-Train;
Shane McMahon defeated Eric Bischoff;
Guerrero beat Benoit & Rhyno & Tajiri;
Kurt Angle defeated Brock Lesnar;
Kane defeated Rob Van Dam;
HHH won the Elimination Chamber;
SUNDAY NIGHT HEAT MATCH
Rey Mysterio defeated Shannon Moore to retain the WWE Cruiserweight title:
WORLD TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH
La Resistance (Sylvain Grenier & Rene Dupre) defeated The Dudley Boyz (Bubba & D-Von) to retain the WWE World Tag Team titles: The Dudleyz hit the 3D but a camera man entered the ring and hit D-Von with the camera! Of course it turned out to be Rob Conway, and this allowed La Resistance to win the match and retain their titles. After the match, Rob Conway took out Bubba & Spike with the camera as well..
Jonathan Coachman & The Dudley Boyz: The Coach commented on how clever La Resistance’s plan was. Bubba Dudley accused The Coach of being anti-American and said those who are anti-American “suck”..
Eric Bischoff & Christian: Christian complained about not being included on the SummerSlam card. Christian offered his services to help Eric Bischoff in his match with Shane McMahon later. Christian asked Eric Bischoff about Linda McMahon, and Eric said he will tell everything later in the show.
The Undertaker defeated A-Train: Two referee bumps occurred and then the Undertaker won after a choke slam! Undertaker was about to power bomb A-Train when Sable got in the ring to try to stop him. Undertaker held Sable so that Stephanie McMahon could slap Sable around. Sable gave Stephanie her dreaded finisher (the evil eye) as she was leaving the ringside area..
IN THE RING
Eric Bischoff: Eric Bischoff was ready to reveal what happened in Linda McMahon’s bedroom, when he addressed Vince McMahon. “What are you doing running around eating hamburgers when you’ve got a hot juicy delicious filet mignon at home?” Bischoff then said that he and Linda McMahon did it again, and again, and again..
Shane McMahon defeated Eric Bischoff: Jonathan Coachman got involved and turned heel, smashing Shane McMahon with repeated chairshots! Eric Bischoff then took it upon himself to turn the match into a NO DQ FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE match. Bischoff ordered the production truck to turn off Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler’s mics, and told The Coach to announce the match alone.. The Coach kept interfering while calling the match on the house microphone. Stone Cold Steve Austin ran down and stomped and eventually stunned Jonathan Coachman.. Stone Cold ordered the production truck to turn Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler’s microphone back on. Austin was about to leave Shane McMahon to do his business. Shane lifted Bischoff’s limp and and slapped Steve Austin (signifying being physically provolked). Austin obliged by giving Bischoff a big stunner in the ring! Shane won with an elbow off the top rope through the spanish announcers table!!
Evolution (Triple H & Ric Flair & Randy Orton & Batista): The Evolution members talked about the Elimination Chamber. Randy Orton began asking the “What if…..?” questions. Ric Flair made it clear that Orton was only in there to help Triple H win the match!
WWE UNITED STATES TITLE 4-WAY MATCH
Eddie Guerrero defeated Chris Benoit and Rhyno and Tajiri to retain the WWE United States title: Rhyno gored Eddie Guerrero Guerrero, who protected himself with the US belt on his chest! Chris Benoit gave Rhyno a diving head-butt.. Benoit and Tajiri ended up taking a bump over the top. Guerrero pinned Rhyno after a frog splash to the back..
WWE HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH
Kurt Angle defeated Brock Lesnar by submission to retain the WWE Heavyweight title: Vince McMahon (Happy Birthday!) came out and interfered on Brock Lesnar’s behalf. Lesnar landed an akward looking F5 on Kurt Angle. Lesnar tried for a second F5, but Angle reversed it into the Anklelock! Lesnar made it to the ropes, but Angle pulled him back to the center of the ring. Angle maintained the Anklelock, and eventually Lesnar tapped out! Kurt Angle-slammed Vince McMahon onto a chair after the match!
Kane defeated Rob Van Dam: Kane won with a tombstone piledriver on the ring steps and rolled him into the ring for the pin..
Terri & Eric Bischoff + Linda McMahon: Eric Bischoff was being stitched and bandaged up after his brutal match with Shane McMahon. Linda McMahon showed up and slapped Bischoff accross the face and walked away!
ELIMINATION CHAMBER FOR THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE
Triple H defeated Bill Goldberg and Randy Orton and Kevin Nash and Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho to retain the World Heavyweight title: Bill Goldberg prooved his marketability when he slipped and fell during his sparkly entrance. Triple H wore long wrestling tights, probably to hide whatever brace he has on underneath. Shawn Michaels & Chris Jericho (as expected) started the match. Randy Orton was the next participant to enter the chamber. Kevin Nash entered next and was eliminated two minutes later after a Shawn Michaels superkick! Triple H enters next and got caught with a superkick from Shawn Michaels! Triple H fell back into his chamber, where he stayed for several minutes because of his injury. Kevin Nash got to his feet and powerbombed Shawn Michaels, Randy Orton, and Chris Jericho before leaving.. Goldberg then entered the match last (work less, paid more!) and speared Randy Orton and pinned him for the elimination. Goldberg speared Chris Jericho through the bullet-proof (plastic) glass of one of the Pods. Goldberg then speared Shawn Michaels, who was coming off the top rope! Goldberg eliminated Michaels after a jackhammer!!! Goldberg then eliminated Jericho after yet another jackhammer. HHH was hiding inside one of the Pods, so Goldberg smashed the glass to get him! Ric Flair was running around at ringside and passed a sledgehammer in to Triple H! Triple H blocked the spear and hit Goldberg with the sledgehammer, followed by a pinfall! Ric Flair & Randy Orton entered the Chamber and the Evolution handcuffed Goldberg to the chain walls. Triple H repeatedly whacked Goldberg with a sledgehammer, busting him WIDE OPEN!!!