The State of RAW Address
September 13, 2003 - by Brendan Falconer

Lance Storm uses muscles
he didn't know he had!

With the impending disaster that is Goldberg's (spit) title run, I've chosen to pretty much ignore the main events on the show right now. Let's face it, this week's was pretty forgetable except for Flair's nasty old-school blading of the bald goon, I'll never get sick of seeing that!

Lance Storm got a match.
Lance Storm won a match.
Lance Storm had fun in a match.
Lance Storm got to kiss Miss Jackie.
(Lance Storm is a lucky bugger!)

Now all we need is Goldust to actually get back in the ring sometime. Regardless, the much maligned 'boring' storyline has paid off and Lance seems to have an energy about him I've not seen in a good few years. I just hope they keep those two minute comedy sketches up, Goldy and Lance are fun! Finally he gets to point out that he's a great wrestler in the ring too, something you'd almost forget about during his heel run and WWE RAW's rule that heels must show no ability in the ring at all (Just look at La Resistance, I've still to see them actually 'wrestle' in a match.)

Things look good for all us Stormtroopers around the world.

It was the night of nasty bumps really, RVD got some, Trish's ringside landing was brutal and Spike... Ouch! That table should have been MUCH closer to the ring, hope he's okay. Sometimes the illusion shatter's and you relaise just how good at what they do these fellow's are.

Austin's 'state of address' was... actually a lot better than I thought, Christian get's funnier by the week and Jericho is... Well, Jericho, I never get bored of him on the mic, an entertaining slot.

Will someone fire Scott Steiner? Please? I feel damned sorry for him because he clearly tries so hard but I hate the fact that e gets to squash Stevie Richards two weeks running and someone far more deserving should be in his place. He's old, he's injured, he's a risk to himself and others.

Let Test win at Unforgiven, for all that is holy. I don't want to see Stacy at the side of the Gammy-biceped one again.

This whole Coach/J.R business is borderline with me, only Al Snow saves it, because he's a fantastic guy, funny as hell and I wish he got more time on RAW, but man wouldn't it be great if these two actually won? Never gonna happen, but it'd be wonderful... Just think, insightful commentary THAT WE COULD UNDERSTAND! Ah, what a concept eh?

5 on 5 tag is always good (Sick Bumps aside) and this one did spice up the dull as muck feud with the Dudleyz. Mark Henry's a laugh, how long before Rodney Mack slips into the background completely now that T&B has an actual black man who's got a little bit of character in the ring?

And as a small mercy for me, there was no waving of the stars and stripes this week either. I know most fans are American and all, but it still seems really dumb to me, especially coming from the Dudleyz.

Anyway, m'off to watch Smackdown (Damn British programming!)

Any comments from my peeps gratefully accepted.

This week's cynicism and venomous outburst by Brendan Falconer, not Vincent K. McMahon's best friend!

And he's right you know, Friends don't let friends chant Goldberg (spit.)



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