Allison Danger on Full Impact Pro Radio

The latest episode of FIP Radio, which features Allison Danger as the special guest, is available for download here:

MSL:  And we are back on FIP Radio, Mister Saint Laurent here, with Allison Danger!  And Allison, you recently made your return to FIP, with the Black Market.  How does it feel to be back?

AD:  It feels damn good to be back!  I’ve missed it here in Florida.  But I’ll tell you right now, it’s HOT!

MSL:  It is very hot!

AD:  When I left it was beautiful, it was lovely.  And now I’m back and it’s all humid.  But it’s because everyone’s hot that we’re back!

MSL:  We’re recording this backstage at an FIP event.  And I heard a rumor, I don’t want to speculate here, but I heard a rumor that the air conditioner turns off automatically, at 10 p.m.  And so I guess the phrase “Hot Summer Nights” was literal here.  Because everyone is pretty much passing out.

AD:  You aren’t kidding!  If I had balls I would have sweat them off hours ago.

MSL:  Really?

AD:  Seriously.

MSL:  I don’t know if that’s actually possible, for your balls to sweat off.   You mean like, to come un-attached?

AD:  Become un-attached.  Sweat dribble right down my leg.

MSL:  Okay, well that’s an interesting visual.  But, you and the Black Market, are back.  What’s on the agenda?  And where were you?

AD:  Kickin’ ass, takin’ names!  You know, they had to take those 3 months off, and that was pretty screwed up.

MSL:  Black Market, loosing the ‘Looser Leaves Town for 90-Days’ match.

AD:  Yeah.

MSL:  And everyday, did you count the days?  Was it a sad experience, the 90-day countdown?

AD:  I was gonna’ put it on my MySpace, the big countdown to when we return.

MSL:  Did you?

AD:  No.  I thought about it though.

MSL:  It’s the thought that counts really.

AD:  It is definitely the thought that counts.  We kept in touch with MySpace, kept everybody’s spirits up, I went overseas for 5 weeks, did some traveling over there, did some wrestling over there.  And just, we concentrated all on getting better, getting in better shape, getting in better condition.

MSL:  Now, where did you go for the 5 weeks?  What did you do?

AD:  I was centered in England, outside of London in a sleepy little village called Hitchen.  And I wrestled through England, Ireland, Wales, Germany, France.

MSL:  So you made good use of the time off.

AD:  Hell yeah.

MSL:  Certainly not happy about the 90-day suspension.

AD:  Stole a lot of stuff.

MSL:  You stole stuff?!  What did you steal?

AD:  I stole a car, in Ireland.

MSL:  I thought you were going to tell me you stole moves from the wrestlers there.

AD:  Maybe one.

MSL:  But you stole items, large, expensive items.

AD:  Well the largest expensive item was a car.  Then there was the cheaper flag that I stole in Germany.  And then there was the priceless heart I stole in France.  And…Yeah, it was a good time!

MSL:  Now is grand theft auto a common hobby of yours?  Or is this a one time thing?

AD:  I was dabbling.  It might be something.  I was just kinda’ testing the waters a little bit.

MSL:  Did they leave the cars in the car?

AD:  They left them in a restaurant.  And they’re like ‘Oh we’re gonna’ leave the keys here.  You can go sit in the car if you want to wait.’, because we were traveling to a show, and I was just like ‘They don’t know I drive a 5-speed, oh hell yeah!’.

MSL:  So you just took the car?

AD:  With three wrestlers in the back seat.

MSL:  So you had accomplices, as well?

AD:  No I had hostages!

MSL:  Now, are there international authorities looking for you?  Are we safe here?

AD:  I wouldn’t be surprised.

MSL:  You kinda’ gotta’ keep it on the d/l, is what you’re sayin’.

AD:  But it gives me street cred, back here in America.

MSL:  But you’ve got the camouflage.

AD:  So you can’t see me at all.

MSL:  You look very dangerous!  Ok, so Black Market is back.

AD:  Yes.
MSL:  And we’ve seen Black Market, in the past, at odds with the Heartbreak Express, some bloody wars.  And now the Heartbreak Express kind of have an issue with the YRR.  And it looks like the Black Market has chosen sides in this battle, and taken the side of the Heartbreak Express.

AD:  Well sometimes you gotta’ look at the bigger picture in things.  We’ve had our battles with the Heartbreak Express, but the bigger enemy right now is the YRR.  And they need to be stopped, and I think we’re the group to stop them.  So, we’ve got a lot of history together.  We know Heartbreak Express, they know Black Market, and we’re all learning about the YRR.  Have you noticed they’re multiplying like rabbits?

MSL:  Yeah, the YRR, I guess because of their big budget, they’re bringing in assassins, there’s new members being added all the time.  We saw Jason Blade with the YRR recently, Mad Man Pondo coming in as a hired gun.

AD:  Jesus!

MSL:  Now, are you scared when you’re out there and you see someone like a Mad Man Pondo?  Or do you think you can take him?

AD:  (laughs)  I don’t know, that stop sign is a little scary.  I got a pretty little forehead I’d like to keep in tact.  And I don’t want any bruises or broken noses, or staples in my arm, or my face, or my head.  It’s just…not nice.

MSL:  So what are the immediate plans for Black Market?  Is it more matches with the YRR?  Is it going after the tag team titles with the Briscoe Brothers?  What comes first?

AD:  Personally, I can’t speak for them.  But…

MSL:  You can speak for them!  We can do whatever we want on FIP Radio!

AD:  YEAH!  Sean, Joey, I’m speaking for you!  What’s up?!  Take that!  Yeah!

MSL:  Anything goes!

AD:  So um, personally, I’d like to go after the YRR.  We’ve tasted gold before, I know we can taste gold again.  We’ve got some issues to settle here, and I’m all about dealing with issues.

MSL:  Now, when you look at the YRR, and you know that they can bring in anybody from the wrestling world, I mean they can basically afford anybody to join their team, how do you combat that?  What is the strategy when you take on people with those kinds of resources?

AD:  It’s difficult.  Just train harder.  Strong heart, strong minds, strong bodies.  And I think good will always win over evil.

MSL:  I don’t know if I believe that.  This is an evil show you’ve stepped onto.  I don’t know if you’ve listened to FIP Radio before…

AD:  Oh, I like evil, I like evil.  But not in my wrestling ring.

MSL:  You separate your life.

AD:  Backstage, evil, a little evil at home. 

MSL:  But out in front of the crowd, try to keep things clean.

AD:  It’s gotta be, right, wrong.  Right down the middle!  Right down the middle, MSL!

MSL:  Now, me as an outside observer, I’ve gotta’ be honest, Allison.  When I look at the FIP landscape, I think the union of the Heartbreak Express and the Black Market, is maybe the only thing that can take out the YRR.  So is it just a circumstance of necessity for those guys?

AD:  It’s gotta’ be.  It’s gotta’ be.  I mean, do you think we’d willingly team up with those guys?  After all the blood that’s been shed, the molestations that have occurred, because there’s been more than one. 

MSL:  We can’t forget about the molestations.

AD:  We cannot forget about the molestations.  I’ve been violated like a kid on MySpace, you know?  Like a kid on MySpace.  Just ridiculous.  But, again, sometimes it’s necessary.

MSL:  I know before we went on, you pretty much demanded that you be given a couple of minutes to talk about your favorite television program.

AD:  Yes!  Absolutely.

MSL:  So that was a concession that we made in order to get you on the show. 

AD:  Yes!

MSL:  So what are you favorite TV shows?  Speak your mind!

AD:  Well, first off, did you see the season finale of Scrubs?

MSL:  I’ve never seen Scrubs in my life.

AD:  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

MSL:  No.

AD:  Seriously!

MSL:  I’m so busy producing FIP Radio.

AD:  Oh, screw that.

MSL:  24 hours a day of nonstop work, on this half hour weekly program.

AD:  That is insane.  You need to slow down.  MSL, take a little vacation, take your laptop with you, go to the beach, get a tan…

MSL:  And watch Scrubs at the beach?

AD:  Yes.  Because I wanna’ know, are JD and Elliot are gonna’ hook up?

MSL:  Now Scrubs, is that on an over the air network?

AD:  Yeah.

MSL:  So I can bring a little portable TV with an antenna to the beach.

AD:  You could.  There’s re-runs everyday!

MSL:  When is Scrubs on?

AD:  It’s on Thursday nights, I wanna’ say it’s NBC.  But I have the DVD’s, so I just pop in the DVD.

MSL:  The beach isn’t going to be very sunny by the time Scrubs comes on.

AD:  Like I said…Do you want to borrow my DVD’s?

MSL:  You have the old seasons on DVD?

AD:  Yup.

MSL:  So bring a portable DVD player, to the beach, and watch old Scrubs.

AD:  You get a tan, you catch up on some of last season’s…

MSL:  I need the tan!

AD:  Um, yeah.  You do.

MSL:  You didn’t have to say it.  We know I need the tan.  Ok so other than Scrubs, what else do you watch?

AD:  Lost.  Did you watch Lost?

MSL:  I’ve never seen Lost in my life.

AD:  Jesus Christ!  What do you do with your time?!

MSL:  FIP Radio is a life consuming project.

AD:  Somebody get this man a vacation!  Seriously!

MSL:  What is Lost?  Lost takes place on a beach right?

AD:  You can go to the beach, and watch people on the beach.  There’s chicks, there’s guns, polar bears.  What?  What more do you want?

MSL:  Now, I’ve been told I look like someone on Lost.

AD:  YES!

MSL:  But I’ve never seen the show, so I guess I look like the polar bear you just mentioned.

AD:  You’re Hurley.

MSL:  Is that the polar bear?

AD:  No.

MSL:  No?  Hurley?  Who is that?

AD:  He’s the sex symbol of Lost.  He gets all the bitches.

MSL:  Really?

AD:  Yes.

MSL:  And the polar bear?

AD:  Crazy tail.  Crazy beach tail.

MSL:  So other than Scrubs or Lost, you got one more you want to plug here?

AD:  One more.  What else do I like to watch?  Wow.  I don’t know.  Oh, Ugly Betty.

MSL:  What’s that?

AD:  God damn.  MSL.

MSL:  Allison Danger is devastated here.

AD:  I’m holding my head in shame.

MSL:  As I have no idea what Ugly Betty is.

AD:  Because nobody appreciates the fact…

MSL:  Is that an indy wrestler?

AD:  No.  Well it should be though.

MSL:  Is that a member of the SHIMMER roster, is Ugly Betty?

AD:  Oh, Prazak!  I got a new gimmick!  No, what bothers me is that not enough people watch Ugly Betty, and so I walk around with my t-shirt that says ‘Guadalajara’ on it, and I am giggling inside, and nobody gets it.  Killer Poncho?  No idea.

MSL:  Is it because she’s so ugly that nobody watches?

AD:  Shes cute!

MSL:  She is.

AD:  She’s cute, you’d hit it.

MSL:  Maybe people don’t watch because the name of the show is misleading?

AD:  Come on!

MSL:  Would you want to watch a show that lied to you?

AD:  Doesn’t all TV lie to you?

MSL:  Like if there was a TV show called ‘MSL is Not Awesome’, who would watch that?  It’s a boldface lie. 

AD:  I’d TiVo it.

MSL:  You would?

AD:  I would.

MSL:  Ok so tell me briefly about Ugly Betty, we’re running out of time here.

AD:  Ugly Betty is tremendous, it’s about a young Mexican woman…

MSL:  Is she a future SHIMMER champion?

AD:  No.  She doesn’t look resilient enough, and the braces could get in the way.

MSL:  She’s got braces?

AD:  She’s got braces, and bushy eyebrows.

MSL:  But she’s cute?

AD:  She’s cute.  And she has a good soul.  She’s like your fat friend with the good personality.  You’re gonna’ hook your friend up with this chick.  You’re like ‘Man, I got this girl for you, she’s got a great personality.’.  You know what that means?  She’s fat.

MSL:  Yeah but do you ever notice on TV shows and movies, the ugly girl, it’s just like, if you take her glasses off, and let her hair down, she’s not ugly.

AD:  She’s All That?!

MSL:  She’s All That.

AD:  Rachel Leigh Cook?

MSL:  You’re not fooling me.

AD:  Who wouldn’t hit Laney looking all scrubish?

MSL:  Who do they think they’re kidding?

AD:  I don’t know.  She’s a hottie.  She’s a hottie.  You’d hit it.

MSL:  I want real ugly people on these shows. 

AD:  That’s what reality television is for.

MSL:  If you’re gonna’ call it Ugly Betty, I want like, Bertha Faye on the show.

AD:  Oh god.  Wow.

MSL:  Let’s talk dream match.  When people think of women’s wrestling, everyone wants to see Bertha Faye versus Allison Danger taking place.  Maybe a computer program making it happen.  What would your strategy be against Bertha Faye, Harvey Wippleman in the corner. 

AD:  Oh god!

MSL:  Former Women’s Champion, Harvey Wippleman.

AD:  I don’t know.  You think she’d be up for a little strong-style?  Maybe some British rounds?  I got to do British rounds, so I’m feeling a little bit more confident about that.  I’ve got to take her off her game.

MSL:  How many rounds were the matches in Britain?

AD:  Oh, we did six, 3 minute rounds.  Oh god.  I’m trying to remember.  I think it was six, and then we were tied and went to a seventh.

MSL:  For those that have no idea what we’re talking about, over in Europe, some of the territories there still use the rounds system like boxing or mixed martial arts.

AD:  My first time with rounds, I faced Sweet Seriah.

MSL:  What was the outcome?

AD:  She pulled it out in the end.

MSL:  So you did not have too much success with the rounds system.

AD:  No but I kept it pretty even.  It was in the end that she pulled it out.

MSL:  Now, if it goes to the time limit, are there judges?

AD:  No.

MSL:  So what’s the point of the rounds, if nobody is judging the rounds?

AD:  You just enjoy.

MSL:  Just something different.

AD:  Something different.  We enjoy rounds.

MSL:  Like a TV show with an actual ugly chick.  Just something that would be different.

AD:  And you know, it was only my first experience with British rounds, so I need to learn a lot more about it.

MSL:  So you’re kinda’ at a disadvantage, having never done them before.

AD:  Absolutely.

MSL:  Allison, thank you for coming on the show.

AD:  Thank you!  Appreciate it!

MSL:  Back in FIP, on FIP Radio for the very first time.

AD:  Come buy my stuff!

MSL:  If you’re listening to this, go see Scrubs, go watch Lost, go watch Ugly Betty.  I’ll check it out, and the next time we have you on, we can talk about Ugly Betty!

AD:  Alright!

MSL:  So we’re gonna’ take a quick break, and we’ll be right back, on FIP Radio!