Katz Files: Nobody Asked Me, But…

The Katz Files – Arnie Katz

Nobody Asked Me, But…

The Kingfish Arnie Katz continues a “Katz Files” tradition with answers to some ticklish questions that no one asked him.

I was watching RAW and
Nobody asked me, but…

… Why do RAW’s announcer keep calling John Leyfield “Bradshaw.” I know he used to be Bradshaw – and was Justin Hawk even before that – but it’s like calling the Undertaker “Mark Callas” or something like that. Of course, if they’re going to revive one of his old tag teams, it might make some sense.

… Am I getting too cynical as a result of watching wrestling so much? When I learned of John Cena’s injury, I had to look it up in mainstream media before I felt confident enough that it wasn’t a work to write about it. This latest injury, which appears to have been somewhat less dire than originally supposed, will probably add to John’s legend as one of the fastest healers in the business. He can’t return to WWE too soon to please me; he’s the lead face, whatever happened at SummerSlam.

… What do you think of the new, loquacious Kane? I’ll bet a lot of neurologists are wondering how he swings from the inability to do more than grunt to a philosopher capable of stringing together long, complex statements. Does anyone remember when Dr. Puppufnik cured George “The Animal” Steele/

… Was the joke so good that WWE couldn’t pass it up for Primo Colon’s first match? I’ll admit that Charlie Haas was somewhat amusing as Carlito, but it would’ve been nice to see Primo Colon showcase more of his ting skills in his first WWE appearance.

… Isn’t Santino Morella the best ring comedian in some time? His skits with Beth Phoenix are a welcome change from what often passes for humor in WWE. And you can’t deny that Glammorella is a fairly strange and intriguing love story.

… Isn’t WWE rushing the Michaels-Jericho showdown just a little? With a loaded card already in place for Unforgiven, it might’ve been wise to hold the match for the October pay per view so that they could build the event around what is sure to be a match-of-the-year contender.

… Hasn’t Cryme Tyme gotten a lot more interesting since the duo returned after a cooling off period? The original characters were such racial stereotypes that it both insulted the audience and made it very hard to find them likeable. They could still use some better writing, but Shad Gaspar and JTG have begun to emerge as personalities instead of caricatures.

I’ll be back tomorrow with another installment of the Internet’s fastest-rising wrestling column. I hope you’ll join me – and I’d be especially grateful if you tell your friends about it.

— Arnie Katz
[email protected]
(8/19/08)

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