TNA IMPACT 01 22 2009


Location: Orlando, Florida (Universal Studios)
Date: January 22, 2009 (Taped: January 13)

Alex Shelley defeated Chris Sabin and Sheik Abdul Bashir and Sonjay Dutt (w/So-Cal Val) to retain the TNA X-Division title: After the match, Sharmell came down and told referee Shane Sewell that Booker T wants to see him in his locker room.. RIGHT NOW!

Jeremy Borash & Booker T & Sharmell & Shane Sewell: Booker T asked Shane Sewell to take a seat next to him and relax. Booker T said last week Sewell did something totally out of order when he put his hands on the TNA Legend’s champion. Booker T said that was grounds for an ass whoopin’! Sharmell calmed Booker down, and he said he wanted to talk some business. Booker T said Sewell will be refereeing his match tonight, and offered him a spot in the Main Event Mafia as someone to clean up their messes. I guess they want a butler.

The Main Event Mafia (Kurt Angle & Sting & Scott Steiner) + Jim Cornette: Kurt Angle said justice will prevail tonight starting with Petey Williams and ending with A.J. Styles. Angle threatened Williams and told Styles that payback is a b*tch! Angle said that the Mafia would put Styles out permanently. Angle asked who died and gave Team 3-D the power to make pay-per-view matches? Angle told Team 3-D to take their challenges and stick them up their fat asses! Sting stepped in and took exception to Angle saying who he can and cannot wrestle. TNA Management Jim Cornette came out to the stage and booked Sting vs. Brother Ray vs. Kurt Angle vs. Brother Devon for the TNA World Heavyweight title at Against All Odds! Cornette said the best way to win a fourway is to divide and conquer, with two guys teaming up and one of them sacrificing themselves. Cornette wondered if Angle would be willing to sacrifice himself for Sting’s TNA World title..

Lauren Brooke & Petey Williams: Petey Williams said it was personal with Scott Steiner. Petey said Steiner has made a living at bullying people. Petey cut a pretty good promo on Big Poppa Pump..

Mike Tenay & Don West + Team 3-D (Brothers Ray & Devon): Team 3-D came through via sattelite with their newly won IWGP Tag Team titles in Japan at the Tokyo Dome. Brother Ray compared it to winning a prestigeous title in Madison Square Garden. Don West informed Team 3-D of the fourway they were booked in at Against All Odds. Brother Ray were caught off guard but that decision but said whatever it takes to get back at the Main Event Mafia. Ray said it won’t be the first time he fights his brother, and Devon said it won’t be the last. Suddenly, they lost the audio feed from Japan.

Jeremy Borash & The Main Event Mafia (Sting & Scott Steiner & Booker T): Sting said tonight was all about respect. Sting said JB was disrespecting them by trying to stir it up between members of the Mafia. Sting said it was all about respect and told Team 3-D to keep that in mind. Scott Steiner cut a crazy promo on Petey Williams. Emphasis on RESPECT!

Sojourner Bolt: In my opinion, they are building Bolt up to become the next JAZZ..

ODB defeated Sojourner Bolt by DQ: The Kongtourage (Amazing Kong, Raisha Saed, & Rhaka Khan) hit the ring and attacked ODB for the disqualification. Roxxi & Taylor Wilde hit the ring to make the save!

Lauren Brooke & The FAKE Sarah Palin + The Beautiful People (Angelina Love & Velvet Sky) + Cute Kip James: Lauren Brooke praised the Fake Sarah Palin for putting one over on the Beautiful People last. She started out in character, but then took off her glasses and said she had so much fun making Angelina & Velvet look like fools. Suddenly the Beautiful People attacked her and destroyed her for several minutes! Cute Kip showed up and called off the Beautiful People and said “she’s had enough!” The Fake Sarah Palin is the famous Daffney but they haven’t come out and said that – yet.

The Main Event Mafia (Scott Steiner & Booker T w/Sharmell) defeated Petey Williams & Eric Young: Eric Young as eliminated first, and the Mafia set their sights on punishing Petey Williams. Petey got some good offense on Big Poppa Pump, but could not overcome the experience of Booker T & Scott Steiner. After the match, the Mafia forced referee Shane Sewell to raise their arms. Booker T slapped Sewell, so Sewell snapped and started fighting Booker until Steiner interjected. Booker T & Scott Steiner double-teamed Shane Sewell, with Booker snapping and attempting to “kill” Sewell. Sharmell & Steiner had to pull Booker T off of Sewell..

Lauren Brooke & Matt Morgan & Abyss: Matt Morgan said that it’s not a big secret that he has a pretty bad temper problem. Morgan said he lost his NBA contract, NFL contract, and most of his wrestling contracts due to his temper. Morgan said worst of all he may have lost his best friend. Morgan said their problems were all his (Matt’s) fault and apologized to Abyss. Morgan said they lost their title-shot, but suggested they settle for Beer Money’s blood tonight. Abyss hugged Morgan and suggested that they start going to therapy together. Morgan was happy to agree to those terms. Abyss said he was so happy to have his best friend back, and has his girlfriend (Lauren) standing next to him. Lauren was like “what the?” Abyss picked her up and spun her around and around and around!

Beer Money Inc. (Robert Roode & James Storm) defeated Matt Morgan & Abyss: Late in the match, Beer Money Inc. was double-teaming Abyss when Matt Morgan jumped in the ring with a steel chair. Morgan threatened to smack both Storm and Roode, but then turned and smashed Abyss over the head with the chair! Abyss started to bleed and Beer Money Inc. was declared the winner! Matt Morgan went total heel and continued the assault on the bloody Abyss after the match! Morgan said “you did this, not me!” before leveling him with a second chairshot to the head!

BACKSTAGE SEGMENT: Abyss was helped backstage by EMT’s and TNA officials. Abyss started flipping out throwing stuff around screaming through his blood soaked mask..

Jeremy Borash & Kurt Angle: Kurt Angle said he has given A.J. Styles too many passes. Angle said he did it because he felt bad for Styles. Angle blamed Styles for breaking up his marriage. Angle promised to take away A.J.’s livelihood tonight just like he took away Jarrett’s at Genesis. Borash asked about Sting and Angle blew the question off.

Kurt Angle (Main Event Mafia) defeated A.J. Styles (The TNA Frontline): The match ended with Kurt Angle putting A.J. Styles through the table with an Angle Slam in the middle of the ring… After the match, Angle stomped Styles’ ankle and continued to assault him! Angle wrapped Styles’ ankle in a folding chair and repeatedly stomped it. Styles screamed in pain! Angle put Styles into the Anklelock and got look with a crazed look in his eyes. Angles went over to Mike Tenay & Don West, who were petrified of Kurt Angle. Angle grabbed the microphone and said tonight was the beginning of the end for TNA. Angle said the Main Event Mafia would start taking everyone out one by one starting next week. Angle got up on the announcers table and screamed “look Ma! I’m on top of the world!”