TNA Impact Wrestling Results – Total Nonstop Deletion
December 15, 2016
Cameron, NC (Dome of The Deletion)
Commentary: Josh Matthews and Jeremy Borash
Recap by: Gerald Bocook of Wrestleview.com
Good evening. Tonight’s Impact broadcast contains scenes that are performed by trained and licensed professions. Do not attempt any of what you are about to see. Thank you. No drones were harmed during the filming of this epic event.
We cut to the lake of Resurrection, Reby at the piano on the shore playing Christmas songs as we see Matt Hardy, Brother Nero, Señor Benjamin, and King Maxel preparing the Hardy Compound for battle. Fireworks, lawn art, dilapidated boats, and six sides of Impact, all ready for Total Nonstop Deletion.
WCAM Action News 7 special report. Death, doom, and destruction can only mean one thing; it’s the holiday season in Cameron! Action News anchor Gilbert Corsey warns us that the Day of Deletion is upon us. Residents have been warned to stay in their homes as the big tag team Apocalypto match in a matter of hours at the Hardy Compound. For the first time in recorded history, seismic activity has been reported in Cameron. We head to Betty Sue Fuentes at the scene.
Betty Sue Fuentes says no, your eyes do not deceive you; she is standing in front of an active volcano that has appeared seemingly out of nowhere. Residents are looking on in shock in awe. She asks one for his thoughts, but it’s Itchweeed, so there are none to be shared. We dealt wit’ tornados, hurricanes, now we dealin’ with a live volcano, man! Itchweeed’s gotta get his yard work done before Total Non-Stop Deletion gets here! He revs up his weed whacker and scares the Betty Sue off. He runs up the volcano, shouting, and then runs down to grab the dropped microphone. Back to the newsroom, folks.
We get an overhead of the Dome of The Deletion, standing at the Hardy Compound, courtesy of Vanguard 1. The entire broadcast will emanate from House Hardy. This is Total Nonstop Deletion.
Inside the Dome of The Deletion, please welcome, the TNA World Tag Team Champions, Broken Matt Hardy and Brother Nero, The Broken Hardys. Matt and Nero make their way to the ring and Señor Benjamin accompanies them wearing a damn Ribera steakhouse satin jacket, and it’s the best thing ever. Matt enters the ring, leading the crowd in a “DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!” chant. “Total Nonstop Deletion, I knew you’d come. Yeaaaasss.” Tonight, Matt has invited fifty of his most loyal soldiers, here at their own risk. The entire city of Cameron has been shut down because of Apocalypto. The seven deities have told him that if he and Brother Nero do not prove that they are the best tag team in all of time or space, that the sacred land of Deletion will be decimated. He and Brother Nero cannot allow that to happen. But he is there to give them all the show of a lifetime. To show them what his Broken Universe is all about. And also, tonight marks the debut of the heir to the throne, King Maxel! It will be absolutely tant—
Rockstar Spud interrupts and enters the Dome of The Deletion, and the crowd wants to delete him! Spud enters the ring, and Matt says he is definitely worth deletion. Spud says that nobody is getting deleted tonight, especially not him. He says he is sick of Matt and his brother and his stupid gardener and his pathetic drone, he’s sick of his wife, but he’s most-of-all sick of his greenhorn one-year-old son getting all his screen time! It takes Spud, a two-time X-Division Champion and future World Heavyweight Champion coming all the way to stinking North Carolina to put this all to rest! He wants Matt’s stupid kid gone. The crowd starts chanting “Maxel!” and Spud flips. The kid hasn’t even had a match, and he’s already more over than Spud has ever been! Spud wants to be Maxel’s first opponent, and he guarantees that he’s going to stretch Maxel, he’s gonna make sure Maxel learns some respect for this business, and he’s going to make sure that Maxel ends up just like his weirdo father; a loser. Matt wants to confirm that Spud won’t face his scheduled opponent and will instead face his son. Spud shouts yes. Matt says he will sanction it. Spud says not to worry, he’ll make the kid look good and when he’s done, Matt can push him to the moon just like any other promoter. Matt asks for an official. Matt says the match will be no disqualifications. Now stand and praise King Maxel!
King Maxel makes his entrance in a Power Wheels Mercedes Benz. I was wrong earlier; this is the best thing ever. Reby walks behind him, and the crowd loudly chants for “Maxel!” Maxel enters the ring.
No-Disqualification Match: Rockstar Spud vs King Maxel
Spud says he’s going to delete Maxel. Maxel does the “delete” taunt. Señor Benjamin pulls something out of his Ribera satin jacket and approaches Spud from behind– Tazer! It was his damn tazer! He tazes Spud in the back and Spud drops like a sack of, well, spuds! Señor Benjamin stands in the corner, drinkin’ it iiiiinnnnn, maaaaaann. Maxel covers; one, two, three!
Winner by pinfall: King Maxel (Señor Stunner – literally)Maxel holds up one finger. In the back, Disco Inferno (What the hell?) looks through the curtain and says he’s glad it wasn’t him this time. Back in the ring, House Hardy celebrates with King Maxel after his first victory.
Earlier today, Lashley arrives at the Hardy Compound. He will be challenging Eddie Edwards for the World Heavyweight Championship. We see said Champion emerging through the woods, approaching the Dome of The Deletion with the Championship on his shoulders.
— Commercial break —
Action News 7 special report; Chaos in Cameron! Gilbert Corsey reminds us that the police have cordoned off the city; roads in and out of the city have been closed down. We go to Betty Sue Fuentes on the scene, standing in front of “Road Closed” signs as a truck rolls up. It’s Gregory Helms. Andrew Everett and Trevor Lee are in the back of the truck. They get a title card that reads “Helms Dynasty – Local Roughnecks”. Helms says he has the best tag team in North Carolina history riding with him. They’re on the road to Apocalypto. Fuentes says there’s a natural disaster forming there, and Helms says he’s something of an expert at that sort of thing. Now stand back! He’s comin’ through. He speeds off through the signs, nearly running down Betty Sue Fuentes! She says things are getting more and more bizarre here.
We’re outside of House Hardy and the— Christ. The Rock ‘n Roll Express is seen walking to the front door of House Hardy. Matt opens the door and says “What an absolute gift!” Matt assumes they’re there for Total Nonstop Deletion. Ricky f’n Morton says they’re there to prove that they’re the greatest tag team that ever lived. Matt understands that they’re for Apocalypto and extends to them an invitation into his humble abode. As they head into the house, Morton says that God loves crazy people; he made a bunch of ‘em.
Back at the Action News 7 desk, Gilbert Corsey says that the Rock ‘N Roll Express and the Hardys for the first time ever is huge! He asks someone off-screen to get his bookie on the phone.
Back at the Dome of The Deletion, Sienna stands in the ring, mic in hand. Sienna says she’s been looking for Rosemary, but apparently she isn’t here! Borash points out that she has a lifetime ban from the Compound for trying to abduct King Maxel. Sienna says that Rosemary isn’t there because she’s afraid of Sienna. She’s going to make herself #1 Contender for the Knockouts Championship. But she’s a classy lady and will put it up for grabs against anyone in the world!
Vanguard 1 takes up the challenge! Vanguard 1 enters the ring and we see that he has his target in his sights. Apparently, she has a tea cup fixation. Target acquired.
The official says that he’s not going to allow a drone to fight a woman. He ejects Vanguard 1! Vanguard 1 says “You can’t toss me bro!” Sienna gets on the mic and says that she apparently needed to be more specific. Any person in the world that would like to challenge her had better make their way to the ring before the referee calls it a forfeit. Borash says something about North Carolina Athletic Commission rules as the reason that the Vanguard 1/Sienna match couldn’t take place. The ref starts counting, and we cut to outside the Dome of The Deletion with a food truck pulling up. The door opens, it’s ODB! “Yeah, the bitch is back!” she yells, taking a hit from a flask as she walks towards the Dome of The Deletion. ODB enters the ring and this one is a go!
Knockouts Championship #1 Contendership: Sienna vs ODB
ODB charges in and ducks a lariat from Sienna, and hits some elbows to the throat of Sienna! Sienna in the corner and an overhand chop sounds through the Dome and sends Sienna reeling! ODB chases Sienna and hits another loud overhand chop. More forearms from ODB and she heads to the far corner, pumpin’ the girls up as she does, but Sienna blindsides ODB and slams her into the corner. Sienna lifts ODB into a fireman’s carry, rushes down with a Samoan drop. Cover; one, two– kickout.
Sienna pulls ODB up, standing headscissor, but ODB pushes Sienna back into the corner and starts laying in with forearms. Sienna takes three or four before shoving ODB away. Sienna charges, ODB ducks the lariat again, and she splashes Sienna in the corner! Sienna slumps in the corner and ODB on the far corner charges, bronco buster!! Sienna is screaming in disgust! ODB gets on the second rope and as Sienna approaches, ODB with a Thesz Press and into a pinning predicament; one, two, t– kickout!
Both women up, Irish whip from ODB is reversed and Sienna sends ODB into the referee, but ODB stops short of crushing the poor ref, and moves as Sienna charges and splashes the ref! Ref down! Ref down! Ref is out of the ring! Sienna with a big boot floors ODB! Sienna rolls out of the ring and grabs a chair. ODB back to her feet slowly, Sienna swings, ODB ducks and slams the chair into Sienna’s face! ODB covers, but there’s no ref! Vanguard 1 switches into referee mode and is down to make the count! One, two– the referee pulls Vanguard 1 out! The ref yells that he’s the official, he has the shirt, he’s not gonna allow that! In the ring, ODB walks around with her flask, about to take a swig when Sienna slams ODB in the back with the chair! ODB staggers around and Sienna is off the ropes– Silencer! Sienna covers and the ref stops playing with Vanguard 1 to make the count; one, two, three!
Winner by pinfall: Sienna (Silencer)
Sienna bails, celebrating as she goes, but in the ring, ODB is standing with Vanguard 1, and she lets Vanguard 1 live out his life-long dream of being a motorboat! Good for you, Vanguard 1!
In the back, the Helms Dynasty approaches the Broken Brilliance. Matt says that what Helms is wearing is even more appalling that his costume from Treat or Delete! Helms says that’s not a costume, Trevor Lee always looks like that. Lee and Everett grimace. Helms says that they’re not here for his shenanigans. This is going to go alpha to Omega. They want this to end where it all began; Apocalpyto in the ring. Matt looks like he’s having a premoneetion. He calls for his scribe, and says it’s good to see him. Tonight at the Lake of Reincarnation, someone in their presence will enter and it will be the most appalling reincarnation we have ever seen. Helms says that if they’re talking appalling, they must be talking about High Voltage, with his flat top, and his goofy glasses. Helms says they’ll see him in Apocalytpo, and Matt says he can’t want to render all three of them obsolete.
Up next, Itchweeed makes his debut next.
— Commercial break —
We get another overview of the Dome of The Deletion from Vanguard 1.
Outside, Itchweeed is riding on a lawnmower before entering the Dome of The Deletion, his weed whacker in tow. We’re told that the following contest will be under House Hardy rules, but we haven’t received any clarification on what that actually means.
House Hardy Rules Match: Itchweeed vs Chet Sterling
Itchweeed shuffles around the ring across his opponent, and Sterling looks apprehensive to lock up. Itchweeed tries to reassure Sterling and walks up to him, and slaps him! Lock-up, Itchweeed with a side headlock, Sterling shoves Itchweeed into the corner and shoves him off into the ropes, Itchweeed with a shoulder tackle and a dropdown into a fist drop! Sterling charges, but Itchweeed with a leaping lariat! Itchweeed covers; one, two– kickout.
Itchweeed with a sleeper hold on Sterling, and Chet Sterling is fading, but it looks like Itchweeed is fading, too! Sterling is down, but Itchweeed faceplants into the mat! Both men are down! The crowd starts shouting “wake up!” Itchweeed finally pops up at the ref’s 7-count. Both men up, and they meet in the center of the ring as Itchweeed hits Sterling with a punch to the face and Sterling responds in kind. They’re trading big punches back and forth, but Sterling with a rake to the eyes stops Itchweeed. Sterling to the ropes, but Itchweeed with a drop toe hold hangs Sterling up on the middle rope! Itchweeed takes to the ropes and hits a leaping dropkick through the ropes to the side of Sterling’s head! Matthews refers to it as the “919”, Cameron’s area code. Itchweeed outside and he sets up a table. He drags Sterling outside and slams him onto the table. Itchweeed up on the apron, diving senton through Sterling and the table! Itchweeed rolls Sterling back into the ring, and Itchweeed with a big elbow drop to Sterling’s chest, the Pesticide Elbow! Itchweeed with the lazy cover; one, two, three!
Winner by pinfall: Itchweeed (Pesticide Elbow)
Back in the ring, Itchweeed has his weed whacker and he’s revving it up! He’s attacking Chet Sterling with it! Sterling’s outfit is torn to shreds! Chet bails from the ring and runs out of the Dome of The Deletion!
Up Next, Lashley challenges Eddie Edwards for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship.
— Commercial break —
We get a Hardy Flashback of Matt Hardy’s personal zoo from before Delete or Decay. We see the vessels of George Washington and “Smokin’” Joe Frazier interacting with the Hardys. Good times.
Aerial coverage of Total Nonstop Deletion was provided by Vanguard 1.
Lashley is the first into the Dome of The Deletion, to a chorus of boos from the Cameron crowd. Lashley enters the ring and TNA World Heavyweight Champion Eddie Edwards enters to a cheer and chants of “Eddie! Eddie!” We get recaps of Edwards’ two victories over Lashley since Bound for Glory. Lashley attacks Edwards, slamming him into the corner as the bell rings!
TNA World Heavyweight Championship Match: Lashley vs (C) Eddie Edwards
Lashley drives his shoulder into Edwards’ stomach repeatedly before punching Edwards down and stomping him to the mat. Lashley chokes Edwards with his foot. Lashley backs up and Edwards retreats to another corner and Lashley chases him, more punches punishing the World Heavyweight Champion. The referee backs Lashley off. Lashley with an Irish whip throws Edwards across the ring. Lashely charges, Edwards gets the boot up to the face and takes to the ropes, but Lashley throws himself at Edwards and a cross body pancakes the Champion! Lashley up, big elbow drop to Edwards. Lashley pulls Edwards up and slides him out of the ring beneath the bottom rope! Edwards goes crashing into the guard rail and lands on concrete! Edwards is holding his knee, but Lashley doesn’t appear to have seen. Lashley is outside of the ring stalking Edwards, as Edwards gets to a vertical base Lashley charges, and Edwards ducks, punches Lashley in the gut and gives him a knife’s edge chop! Edwards with a kick, but Lashley catches it and spins into Edwards with a back elbow! Edwards is staggered and Lashley hammers him with a lariat! Lashley tosses Edwards around the ring and then shoves a fan! Edwards with chops to Lashley against the guard rail! The fans grab Lashley and hold him down! Edwards rears back and slams into Lashley with a huge chop! Eddie moves Lashley to another guard rail and the fans there hold Lashley down as well! Eddie goes to the other side of the entrance ramp and charges, leaping at Lashley with a flying forearm and connects! Eddie with more chops, but Lashley shoves Edwards aside and slides into the ring. Lashley taunts Edwards from the outside and Edwards takes his shirt off since he didn’t get a chance to at the start of the match.
— Commercial break —
Back from break and Edwards is in the corner. Lashley charges but Edwards gets the back elbow up into Lashley’s face. Eddie charges the staggered Lashley and takes him down with a lariat. Irish whip, reversed by Lashley, Lashley drops down, Lashley leap frogs, Lashley levels Edwards with a lariat! Lashley talks trash to the fans that were holding him down. Lashley stomps at Edwards, then pulls Eddie to his feet, twisting him into a neckbreaker. Lashley covers; one, two– kickout.
Lashley with a side choke, Eddie slowly to his feet, elbows and punches his way out, takes to the ropes, but Lashley levels him with a back elbow. Lashley taunts and takes his time covering; one, two– kickout.
Lashley puts his knee against Edwards’ back and pulls his head up, bending Eddie in half. Eddie in the corner and Lashley hammers Eddie down before stomping at him. Lashley pulls Lashley up, Irish whip, hard into the far corner and Lashley charges Eddie in the corner, big shoulder tackle crushes Eddie. Lashley pulls Eddie out of the corner, up in the vertical suplex, and Lashley’s just gonna let it hang. A good few seconds lapse and Eddie manages to slide off the shoulder, Eddie Edwards with the blue thunder bomb! He can’t make the pin though, and both men are down, with Lashley rolling toward the apron. Both men staggering up to their feet, Lashley charges, but Eddie with a Manhattan drop stops Lashley’s momentum! Eddie hits the ropes, Lashley with a tilt-o-whirl has Eddie on his shoulders, Lashley charges the corner and tosses Eddie off into the top turnbuckle pad! Lashley taunts the crowd members that got involved again. Lashley puts his knee against Eddie’s head and pulls him arm out, Lashley staggering as Eddie tries to get to his feet, and Lashley throws Eddie down. Lashley covers; one, two– kickout!
The crowd starts taunting Lashley, “You can’t beat him!” as Lashley sets Edwards on the top turnbuckle. Lashley climbs up the ropes, front facelock, but Eddie manages to throw Lashley off of him. Eddie off the top, huge missile dropkick sends Lashley sprawling across the ring! Lashley charges Edwards, Eddie drops and takes the rope with him, sending Lashley over the ropes to the outside! Eddie off the far side ropes and the suicide dive connects, nearly sending both men over the guard rail! Eddie got some good clearance there, and the space between the ring and the rail looks to be about twice what it is at the Impact Zone! Lashley rolled back into the ring and Eddie slides in after him, Shining Wizard! Eddie covers; one, two, t– kickout!
Eddie heads up to the top, diving stomp– Lashley rolls out of the way! Eddie rolls to his feet from the whiffed double stop, turns to Lashley, and Lashley is up and levels him with a lariat! Lashley with a gutwrench, slam! Dominator! Lashley covers; one, two, thr– kickout!
Lashley up, stalking Eddie, looking for the Spear, Eddie staggering up slowly, Lashley charges and Eddie sidesteps, sending Lashley into the corner! Lashley catches himself and Eddie charges, getting a back elbow for the effort, Lashley up on the middle rope, but Eddie takes him down with the leaping kick sending Lashley to the floor! Lashley up and walking around the ring, Eddie slingshots over the top and Lashley moves out of the way, but Edwards lands on his feet on the apron and he kicks Lashley in the chest as Lashley turns around to see what happened! Eddie leaps off the apron, looking for a frankensteiner, but Lashley catches him and lifts him up, throwing powerbomb into the group of fans that were helping Edwards earler! The whole crowd falls to the ground! Lashley enters the crowd and grabs Edwards, throwing him over the guard rail and following him. Eddie staggers and Lashley punches him in the face. Lashley hammers Edwards on the ground and elbows Eddie. They’re near the wall of the Dome of The Deletion and Lashley stalks Edwards as he staggers up, Lashley charges– Spear connects, and they go through the wall of the Dome of The Deletion! This fight has now gone outside the arena!
— Commercial break —
We receive again the warning about tonight’s Impact and do not try this at home from Senor Benjamin and Vanguard 1.
We see Lashley and Edwards brawling outside in the woods of Cameron. We’re told that Matt Hardy has sanctioned the match to go as long as it takes, wherever it takes, but that Tag Team Apocalypto must begin (this is an hour as twelve minutes into the broadcast as well, so this match is going to be BATSHIT CRAZY, PEOPLE!)
The rules for tag team Apocalypto are as follows;
– Falls Count Anywhere,
– Match ends when every team, but one, has been pinned or submits,
– Match begins inside the Dome of The Deletion.
The Broken Hardys, the World Tag Team Champions, will be out first. Matt says that Total Nonstop Deletion has been a breakthrough event. But now it is time for Armageddon, for Apocalypto. Every tag team in the history of professional wrestling is invited, so please, come forth to challenge the Broken Hardys.
First into the Dome of The Deletion are the Helms Dynasty, accompanied by Gregory Helms. They’re followed by the Rock ‘N Roll Express. Decay is the next to enter. Crazzy Steve looks like he’s about to pull his teeth out. An alarm blares, saying that Apocalypto has begun and that the public must evacuate the property. Smoke and pulsing lights flash in the arena, and members of the crowd are seen leaving the Dome of The Deletion as the brawl begins inside the ring. It’s really hard to tell what’s going on right now, but I’m gonna do my best!
Tag Team Apocalypto for TNA World Tag Team Championships: (C) The Broken Hardys vs The Helms Dynasty (Andrew Everett and Trevor Lee (w/ Gregory Helms)) vs Rock ‘N Roll Express (Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson) vs Decay (Abyss and Crazzy Steve)
Teams are getting beaten out of the ring. Helms sends the boys against Matt and Brother Nero, while the Rock ‘N Roll Express are going after Decay, knocking them off the apron. Ricky Morton is on the ground, going after someone, and Trevor Lee and Gregory Helms are teaming up on Brother Nero. Lee gets attacked by Nero, and Abyss is beating Ricky Morton. Everyone seems to be out of the ring and heading towards the grounds.
We see Eddie Edwards being thrown into a field. He charges Lashley and Lashley picks him up by the neck, choking Edwards for an uncomfortably long time before we cut away.
Matt says to Morton and Gibson, “We were all teen heartthrobs at one time, but for one last time, let’s show them that babyface fire,” as he presents giant roman candles to the excitement of the Rock ‘N Roll Express. We see the Helms Dynasty running away, and Abyss’ eyes go wide. “Oh, no. Not again!” Abyss and Crazzy Steve run for it. We see the four men, armed with their Roman candles, streaking fire and flame in pursuit of Decay and the Helms Dynasty. We see Abyss getting a few shots to the back. Under heavy fire, Gregory Helms gets Everett and Lee to the truck and Helms has already had enough, he’s getting the hell outta there. Everett is in the cab and Lee in the bed, when Matt Hardy appears behind Lee. As the truck drives off, Hardy is slamming Lee’s head into the roof of the cab, yelling “Delete!” with every blow. Everett tries to get out of the cab, and Matt is fending off both men. We see a referee just looking bewildered, and Nero appears. He tells the ref that they have to catch him, it’s the only way to know for sure. Nero has a dirt bike and gets the reluctant referee to get on the bike with him. They speed off in pursuit of Matt and the Helms boys. Andrew Everett is still hanging outside the cab, the occasional punch to the face the only thing to remind him that he’s still alive.
Outside the gates to the Hardy Compound, a bunch of people are waiting, a lot of teams that I do not know (but maybe we’ll learn about! Together!) and Decay appears. The gates are open and Abyss says that this is going to be beautiful.
The Hardys and the Helms Dynasty are roadside, and we see Everett and Lee getting thrown into road signs. Matt goes for a pin one Everett; one, two– broken up by Helms! Nero pulls Helms off and Lee is there to attack Nero. A tanker truck drives nearby, horn blaring, as Nero is slammed into one of the signs by Helms and Lee.
Now entering Apocalypto: the Bruiserweights. One of the teams approaches Decay, and one member is met with a throat chop from Steve. The other is chokeslammed by Abyss. Steve apparently breaks the neck of the man he punched in the throat! The other teams outside the gates groan. “Ya boy dead,” one of them says. Steve pins him and a ref appears; one, two, three!
The Bruiserweights have been eliminated. And one of them might have been murdered.
Abyss says he’s still hungry. Bring on the next course!
Outside the gates, Rockstar Spud is looking at his watch impatiently. A pair of men come up and ask if it’s the line for Apocalypto. He says it is, idiots. Who the hell are you? They’re Lancelot and Harlan, the world-famous Bravado Brothers. Rockstar Spud says he has no idea who they are, but when his big, bad partner gets here, those two’ll be the first to go. He tells them off.
The Broken Hardys and the Helms Dynasty are brawling outside an antique shop. Jeff is holding his own against Lee and Helms, but Everett clobbers him with a traffic cone and knocks him down. Everett covers; one, two– kickout.
Helms punches the referee in retaliation for not counting the fall. Lee is choking Matt and Helms says that he saw some of his merchandise in there, on the clearance rack, cuz nobody wants it! Everett says that someone named “Jeff” is an antique!
Now entering Apocalypto: the Ugly Ducklings. One of the men charges Crazzy Steve and gets caught in a crossface chickenwing. A second charges Abyss and gets grabbed by the throat. A third man has climbed up the gate and leaps off at Abyss, but Abyss catches him and a double chokeslam to both men from The Monster stops them cold! “Quack! Quack!” Abyss taunts the two men. Abyss stacks one of them atop the other and pins; one, two, three.
The Ugly Ducklings have been eliminated.
A train streaks by where the Hardys are fighting the Helms Dynasty. Matt is being attacked by Gregory Helms and Andrew Everett, and he starts biting Helms’ face. Lee and Hardy are fighting around the train crossing sign.
Decay approach the gates to the Hardy Compound. One man says they don’t even want to go in there. His partner runs off screaming as Abyss grabs the man and pulls him into the gate, knocking him out. The gates open.
Now entering Apocalypto: Show Time.
Both men get a kick to the gut. One is thrown into the gate by Crazzy Steve and the other by Abyss. The Bravado Brothers sneak past the carnage and enter the Compound. The Bravados have arrived. Abyss and Crazzy Steve see two large men outside the gates, one of which wears a mask. Crazzy Steve with the poison mist in the face of the huge man not wearing a mask! Abyss with a kick to the family jewels to the masked man! Steve bites the forehead of the man he blinded! Abyss grabs a huge rock and comments on its weight before bringing it down on the head of the man in the mask. Abyss puts a foot on the man’s chest; one, two, three.
Unknown Team has been eliminated. One of them might also have been murdered.
Rockstar Spud paces outside the gate, still waiting for his partner. He wants in, and Abyss taunts him. Spud says his partner is coming, and he’s a lot bigger than Abyss, and Steve is next. Uh-oh. The Big Man has arrived. Decay are intrigued.
— Commercial break —
It’s Swoggle! The King of Small Style has arrived at Apocalypto! Swoggle gets in Abyss’ face… well, his belly, and Spud pulls him away and runs off. Abyss looks perplexed.
Back with the Hardys and Helms Dynasty, it looks like they’ve somehow made it back to the Hardy Compound. They’re fighting near the Lake of Reincarnation, and Matt is trying to fend off Helms, Everett, and Lee when Everett hits a leaping enzuigiri and Lee follows up with a jumping knee kick. Lee pins; one, two, th– Skarsgård breaks the pin! The damn boat broke the pin, slamming into Trevor Lee’s creepy face!
Helms yells at Everett to kick the boat’s ass! Lee joins in, and now all three members of the Helms Dynasty are beating on Skarsgård! Nero attacks Everett, and then Lee, and then knocks them together. Helms turns around into Matt Hardy, who yells at him for desecrating Skarsgård and says Helms needs a change of attitude before shoving Helms into the Lake of Regeneration! Matt and Nero reconvene, and turn around in horror. “Lake of Reincarnation, how could you? I’ve never seen you produce such a revolting result.” It’s 3 Count! Sugar Shane Helms is dancing with Trevor Lee and Andrew Everett, complete with the little circle platforms underneath their feet! Suddenly, Sugar Shane realizes something is amiss. These guys aren’t Shannon and Evan, Shannon and Evan were way better than this! Lee and Everett with a double superkick, sending Helms back into the Lake of Reincarnation! The Bravado Brothers appear, and they each roll up a member of the Helms Dynasty! One, two– both men kick out!
The Bravados pick up the dancing platforms and throw them at Lee and Everett.
In an outside, 4-cornered ring, the Rock ‘N Roll Express call out the Hardys. Matt says to make this dream match a reality! The volcano flares up in the background. Morton and Nero tie-up, as do Matt and Gibson. Matt and Nero get their man in the corners, punching away. Matt and Nero with the Irish whip, sending their man into the center of the ring, but the Express does the ol’ do-see-do and come back punching at the Hardys. Morton and Gibson whip their man into the center of the ring, and the Hardys collide! Morton throws Nero into the corner, Gibson whips Matt against the ropes, Gibson with a punch to the gut and Morton with a sunset flip; one, two– broken up by Nero!
Gibson punches at Nero in the corner as Matt struggles against Morton.
We see Lashley and Edwards again, Lashley pulling Edwards up into the Oklahoma Stampede, looking to throw Edwards into a huge post in the ground, but Eddie slides off and throws Lashley into it!
Trevor Lee is sent flying into a portajon, and a referee emerges from it, demanding to know what in the hell is going on! Harlan Bravado is thrown into a wall of the Dome of The Deletion by Lee, who then charges but gets put on Harlan’s shoulders and Harlan begins an airplane spin! Andrew Everett with a standing moonsault onto Lancelot Bravado! Harlan drops Lee and grabs his legs, slingshotting Lee into an entryway door to the Dome! The Bravados grab Everett and double team Irish whip him towards Lee, but Lee opens the door and Everett makes it safely inside! Lee follows, leaving the Bravados outside the now-locked door! The referee demands that they open the door or they’ll be disqualified. One, two, three, four– the door unlocks and the Bravados give chase!
Inside the still-smoky Dome of The Deletion, the Bravados are beset by Lee and Everett from behind!
Back outside, Matt has Robert Gibson in a sleeper hold, and Nero and Ricky Morton are in cranes, going higher and higher above the ring!
— Commercial break —
Above the ring, Nero and Morton lock-up, with Morton slamming Nero’s harm into the basket. The two start trading blows, tie-up again, and Morton twists Nero’s arm before biting his fingers. He drags Nero out of the basket, still laying punches into the face of Nero. Matt is struggling with Gibson, who has broken out of the sleeper hold and is stomping away at Matt, and is going to try for the Gibson Leglock, but Matt kicks him off and into the corner post! Matt rolls outside the ring and starts fiddling with the controls to Morton’s sky lift, saying that Ricky Morton is an angel! Morton tells him to stop, that he’s high fucking enough!
Back in the Dome of the Deletion, the Bravados are still warring with the Helms Dynasty. Trevor Lee is thrown out of the ring and Lancelot grabs Everett in a reverse wheelbarrow, holds him up so Harlan can spring off the ropes into a cutter! Lancelot covers; one, two, th– kickout!
Back at the outside ring, Rocky Morton suspended high, Brother Nero is still in his crane. He makes his way out of the basket and– No, he’s going for the Swanton Bomb on Robert Gibson!! Nero dives, and it’s in slow-mo! Gibson moves at just the last second! Nero crashes and burns! Gibson tries to take advantage but Matt with a Twist of Fate on Gibson! Matt covers; one, two, three!
Rock ‘N Roll Express have been eliminated.
Matt makes sure Nero can stand and welcomes Ricky Morton to the darkness of deletion! The lights around the ring go out and Morton yells at Matt, “You broken son of a bitch, let me down! Please?”
Back at the Dome, Andrew Everett is turned inside out by a lariat from one of the Bravados. Spud and Swoggle make their way to the ring. Swoggle grabs a chair from under the ring and starts attacking everybody! Bravados are first, and Spud shoves Swoggle aside to make the pin; one, two, three!
The Bravado Brothers have been eliminated.
Spud celebrates like the match is over, and Swoggle isn’t having it. Spud is on the middle rope, celebrating to no crowd, and Swoggle pulls him down into a powerbomb! Swoggle goes up, Tadpole Splash! He says to Everett and Lee that Spud is all theirs and bails. Everett covers; one, two, three!
Rockstar Spud and Swoggle have been eliminated.
More brawling outside between Lashley and Edwards. Eddie has Lashley on the defensive, but Lashley gets a cheap shot in and starts choking Eddie with his sweatband.
Ricky Morton is still up in the crane, demanding to be let down. Suddenly, Road Warrior Animal appears and asks Morton what Matt Hardy got him into this time. Morton says that the rib is over. Someone let him down.
Abyss and Crazzy Steve are leaving the gates when a member of the DCC appears. The gates open, and Abyss says that he sees they came alone. A large number of men in hooded sweaters and masks appear and enter the grounds. Now entering Apocalypto: The DCC. The actual DCC member backs away. The men swarm Abyss and Steve, but they’re made short work of. They see the DCC member approach, and he says that he’s about to be “all over them like a spider monkey” when one of the hooded men pops up and says he’s got ‘em. The DCC member takes off his mask and it’s James Storm. He asks who the hell this guy is. The guy says he heard on the scanner this was goin’ down, and when you’re DCC, you’re DCC for– Steve punches him in the throat and the man goes down! Abyss goes face-to-face with Storm while having one foot on the downed man’s chest, and the referee counts; one, two, three!
DCC has been eliminated.
Storm blows his stack at the referee, saying he doesn’t even know who this guy was! The ref implies that the guy arrived as part of DCC, he’s been pinned, they’re eliminated! Storm angrily chases the ref off. One of the other men has gotten back to his feet and Storm gives him a Last Call before walking off. Steve suggests to Abyss that they go add to this pile of bones.
— Commercial break —
We rejoin the chaos near the summit of the volcano at the Hardy Compound! Abyss and Matt brawl, Nero and Crazzy Steve are trading punches, and Eddie Edwards and Lashley are still fighting it out even here! The volcano releases flames into the sky as Nero is gouging at Crazzy Steve’s eyes! It looks like Nero is about to finish Steve off when the volcano erupts! All the men are blown back, sent flying by the shockwave! We see Skarsgård at the Lake of Regeneration, and a mysterious green bolt of light emerges from the Lake! It lands in front of Skarsgård and it’s The Hurricane! “Holy Betrayal! There will be a reckoning!” he proclaims before taking off in a burst of green light.
Action News 7 special report. We join Gilbert Corsey says that this may be their last broadcast together. He never believed that he’d die at a news desk. He says the fate of the Land of Deletion, along with all of Cameron, is in the hands of the Hardys.
Back at that very Land of Deletion, Everett and Lee approach the volcano. Abyss spots them and tells them to take care of Matt; he and Steve will take care of Brother Nero. Abyss slams Nero into the corner post before Steve starts biting at him.
Lee and Everett are in the graveyard, and Everett tries to throw Matt into one of the crosses, but Matt reverses and tosses Everett into the cross instead! Lee grabs Matt and throws him into a cross anyway, and then grabs a huge cinder block, raising it high, looking to bring it down on Matt! Matt kicks him in the gut but a headbutt from Everett stops him in his tracks. Everett punches Matt down and Lee is attacking Matt with some sort of pipe. The two stalk Matt before throwing him into another tombstone.
Back in the ring by the volcano, Nero is thrown to the ropes and comes off them with a flying double clothesline, taking down both Abyss and Crazzy Steve! Steve is up, Twist of Fate from Nero! Abyss is up! Twist of Fate– no, Abyss spins out– Chokeslam! Nero rolls out of the ring. Abyss approaches the corner, looking for Janice, welcomes her to the party, and turns around to see Nero with a Roman candle. Nero is about to light it up, but Steve comes from nowhere and takes Nero out! Nero rolls out of the ring and Steve attacks him, choking him! Abyss looks up and sees something in the sky, something that takes his attention… It’s Vanguard 1 in battle mode! Vanguard 1 starts raining fire down on Abyss, who grabs the Roman candle and tries to fight back but doesn’t seem to be able to connect! The two trade shots, but it seems that Vanguard 1 wins this fight!
Back with the Dynasty and Matt, Everett and Lee have shovels and are stalking Hardy. They raise the shovels above their heads and Lee says that this is how they’re going to delete– someone grabs the shovels! It’s Hurricane! He grabs the shovels out of both men’s hands and throws one to Matt, and the two swing and clobber a man. Hurricane says “Looks like this Dynasty… is broken.” Matt says it’s delightful to see the super hero on the right side again. Matt and Hurricane each make a pin; one, two, three.
The Helms Dynasty has been eliminated.
Matt and Hurricane bury Lee and Everett. Matt says that even the man with three H’s would be proud of how they buried this young, promising talent before the two give a smile and a thumbs up to the camera.
Outside of the Hardy House, we see Lashley and Edwards still fighting. Lashley throws Edwards onto the porch and then we see him Spearing someone that Decay managed to not kill from earlier. We see him Spear the man who ran away earlier as well! Then we see Swoggle. He and Lashley lock eyes. They circle, and Swoggle starts kicking at the ground like a bull. He charges, SPEAR!
…not moving an inch. He just has that look on his face of, “I’m too old for this.” He turns around and suddenly, Edwards leaps off the porch and takes Lashley down!
We see Abyss and Crazzy Steve in the lawn, being stalked by Brother Nero. Vanguard 1 lights the grounds on fire again, the huge Hardys symbol, and Abyss and Nero collide, trading blows, surrounded by flames. Matt appears and attacks Steve, biting him at one point after delivering headbutts. Matt and Nero trade off, with Matt attacking Abyss and Steve fighting Nero. Abyss throws Matt into the ring, saying he’ll show Matt “Broken”. Abyss grabs Janice, and charges Matt, but Matt kicks Abyss in the uprights and grabs Janice for himself! Abyss looks fearful, and Matt says this is going to sting a little before slamming the weapon into Abyss’ gut!
On the volcano, Crazzy Steve and Nero are still fighting! Steve says that it’s time to render Brother Nero obsolete! He picks Nero up but Nero kicks him in the gut, Twist of Fate! The recoil sends Crazzy Steve into the mouth of the volcano!! The volcano shakes and smokes and erupts! A huge fireball is sent up, and— it’s Steve! He’s sent flying, and he lands in the ring, a charred husk of a Crazzy Steve! Matt rolls him over and covers; one, two, three!
Decay has been eliminated.
Winners and STILL TNA World Tag Team Champions: The Broken Hardys
The Hardy crew stand near the top of the volcano as it spews fire into the air, celebrating their victory. Matt says that the Land of Deletion has nearly been annihilated, but the six of them will rebuild it! Reby corrects him; seven. Matt says that’s wonderful! We pan away from the Hardy Compound as the volcano continues to erupt.
1) King Maxel def. Rockstar Spud
2) Sienna def. ODB to become TNA Knockouts Championship #1 Contender
3) Itchweeed def. Chet Sterling
4) Eddie Edwards and Lashley was not shown to have finished
5) The Broken Hardys won Tag Team Apocalypto to retain the TNA World Tag Team Championships
– Maybe two more hours of Lashley/Edwards? No clue!