WWE Monday Night RAW 08 10 2009

August 10, 2009 – Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Announcers: Michael Cole & Jerry “The King” Lawler

WWE champion Randy Orton + John Cena + Chris Jericho & The Big Show: Randy Orton said people have been talking behind his back saying that he was worried about facing John Cena at SummerSlam. Orton said he does not answer to the people because their opinions do not matter to him. Orton said he will face Cena at SummerSlam and beat Cena at SummerSlam – and that is NOT a rumor! John Cena came out amd expressed his anger at Orton. Cena said he was tired of Orton walking around like the business owes him something. Cena challenged Orton to bully him tonight and they pressed foreheads. Suddenly Chris Jericho & The Big Show showed up. Big Show said Orton and Cena are trying to intimidate each other but neither of them know what intimidation is. Big Show said he knows how to intimidate. Jericho said they were out there because RAW was in his country – CANADA! Big cheer and chants for Y2J! Cena reminded everyone that Jericho chose to leave Canada and migrate to the United States. Jericho said he met with “guest host” Sgt. Slaughter and he said he wanted to do something he’s never done before. Jericho said Slaughter gave him a one-on-one match with Cena and tonight in Calgary, for the first time ever, he’s going to beat Cena! Orton threatened to punch Cena in the skull later tonight. Big Show informed Orton that he will face him tonight as well.

Gail Kim defeated Beth Phoenix and Kelly Kelly and Alicia Fox (pinned): There were no tags, and all four Divas were allowed in the ring at the same time. That’s one way to speed things up a bit!

“Guest Host” Sgt. Slaughter: Sgt. Slaughter got booed, but he came out and said “thank you, thank you!” It doesn’t make sense to have Slaughter guest host an episode of RAW in Canada. Slaughter kissed up to the Canadians saying he respects his neighbors to the North and showed his respect by saluting the Canadian flag. Slaughter then turned heel saying if it wasn’t for Uncle Sam all the Canadians would be speaking Russian and French right now. Slaughter said that Canadians take the United States’ protection for granted. Slaughter said he had a better idea; he demanded that everyone stand up and pay their respects to the greatest country in the world. An American flag appeared on screen while Slaughter recited the Pledge of Allegiance.

Jack Swagger defeated Evan Bourne: This would be their third match, having both gotten victories over each other. Swagger won and was as arrogant as ever. Montel Vontavious Porter came out after the match and kissed up to the Canadians. MVP challenged Swagger to a match tonight unless he is an All-American Wimp. Swagger said he would give MVP an answer next week. MVP knocked Swagger on his butt and he rolled out of the ring and shook his head all the way to the back.

Triple H + Shawn Michaels: Triple H was in Texas searching for Shawn Michaels at an office building where Michaels said to meet him. Triple H left a message on Michaels’ answering machine. The cameras found Shawn Michaels working as a burger flipper getting mad at an impatient girl. Michaels stood up and saw Triple H standing there and said “Hey Hunter” and walked back to the kitchen. Triple H’s jaw dropped and he was speechless.

“Guest Host” Sgt. Slaughter + Jillian Hall: Sgt. Slaughter said he was just kidding before and went out and got Celine Dion to sing the Canadian Anthem. Okay he didn’t get her, but he got someone else. Jillian Hall came out wearing Red, White, & Blue and did an ear-piercing version of God Bless America.

The Calgary Kid defeated Eugene: Eugene was back on RAW! His opponent was a masked man named “The Calgary Kid” wearing a Calgary Flames jersey. The Calgary Kid was a well-build athlete, while Eugene is a lot “softer” since we last saw him. I had a weird feeling that the Calgary Kid was the Miz, and I was right! So the Miz earned his place back on RAW.

The Big Show defeated WWE champion Randy Orton by intentional Countout: The Big Show manhandled Randy Orton so much that Orton walked out of the match so that he may life to fight another day..

Triple H & Shawn Michaels: Triple H talked to Shawn Michaels about being a cook (or “Chef” as Michaels put it) for some corporate nimrods. Those corporate nimrods were standing just off camera, so Michaels said those nimrods were like his brothers! Michaels said it was over after WrestleMania and the people here respect him. The rude girl showed up again complaining that her tater-tots suck. She said her dad was the Vice-President and threw the tater-tots in Michaels’ face! Michaels asked why he would want to leave all of this? Triple H said Rhodes & DiBiase are driving him crazy and he needs help. Michaels said he didn’t want to hear it. Michaels said he was happy now and is really good at what he does. Suddenly, the grill shot up in flames and Michaels freaked out with the fire-extinguisher. Michaels looked at HHH and said “alright, I’ll listen.”

Montel Vontavious Porter defeated “The Masterpiece” Chris Masters: After the match, Jack Swagger slowly walked down to ringside as MVP invited him into the ring. Chris Masters snuck up behind MVP and put him in the Masterlock. Swagger entered the ring and took MVP away from Masters and planted him with an Implant Power-bomb!

Triple H & Shawn Michaels: Triple H continued to talk to Shawn Michaels about coming back to help him fight Rhodes & DiBiase. Triple H ended up flipping burgers right besides Michaels. The boss came in and yelled at “Hickenbottom” for yelling at a little girl and setting the grill on fire. The boss continued yelling and threatened to fire Michaels, so his wrestler instincts kicked in and he superkicked the boss! They did the “I got two words for ya!” thing and an old lady walked by and said “SUCK IT!” Then Shawn Michaels went over and super-kicked the whiney little girl (well, not really). Michaels turned up the grill to flame and yelled “I quit!”

“Guest Host” Sgt. Slaughter + “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan: Sgt. Slaughter thanked the Canadian fans for being such great sports tonight when he was making fun of Canada. Slaughter said he wanted to make it up to the fans and said he wanted to bring out a special guest. Slaughter introduced the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be — and the crowd popped for Bret “Hitman” Hart. Unfortunately the Hitman did not show up, but “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan marched out waving the United States flag!

Legacy (Ted DiBiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes) defeated Mark Henry & Hornswoggle: Chavo Guerrero came out and said due to his injuries from last week, he could not compete, but he found a replacement team. After the match, Ted DiBiase said the reformation of Degeneration-X does not scare them. DiBiase answered Triple H’s question, saying “we ARE ready!” And Rhodes added that “if you’re not down with that, we got two words for ya….. TOO BAD!”

Josh Mathews & Chris Jericho: Chris Jericho said tonight he would beat John Cena for the first time EVER! Jericho talked about training in Stu Hart’s Dungeon and dedicated the match to the city of Calgary.

John Cena vs. Chris Jericho ended in a No Contest: John Cena battled out of the Walls of Jericho and put Jericho in the STF-U! Randy Orton showed up and Cena released the hold and confronted Orton. Jericho snuck in behind Cena and nailed him with a Code-breaker. Sgt. Slaughter came out and booked Chris Jericho & The Big Show vs. John Cena & Randy Orton next week. Cena & Orton clotheslined Jericho over the top rope! Cena picked up Jericho for an Attitude Adjustment and Orton executed an RKO at the same time. Jericho landed on his forehead and his neck bent in an awkward position. Ouch.