WWE Monday Night RAW 11 09 2009

November 9, 2009 – Sheffield, England
Announcers: Michael Cole & Jerry “The King” Lawler

“Guest Host” Ricky Hatton + The Big Show & Chris Jericho + DX (Shawn Michaels & Triple H): The ring announcer introduced tonight’s guest host, professional boxer Ricky Hatton. Never heard of him. Of course, the Bella Twins were there whoring themselves out like they do for every RAW guest host. Hatton talked about accepting the offer to host RAW, and showed a video of him winning the boxing World title in Sheffield a few years ago (and a few pounds ago). The Big Show & Chris Jericho crashed the party. Big Show said he had a good English breakfast bigger than Hatton. Big Show told Hatton to get out of the ring before they make a memory that he’ll never forget. Hatton asked Big Show why he has to be like that, and confessed that he was a fan of Big Show – especially when he got knocked out at WrestleMania by a boxer. Big Show said he would give Hatton one free shot, just like he did for Floyd Mayweather. Big Show held out his chin, but Hatton said he needed a ladder first. Big Show got down on his knees, and Hatton started to warm up. Hatton was about to punch the Big Show, but Jericho got in the way and stopped him. Jericho said he wasn’t going to let the Big Show embarrass himself again. Big Show asked what that was supposed to mean. Jericho said he was on a roll, and he’s the best he’s ever been. Jericho said he was single-handedly responsible for SmackDown! winning at Survivor Series, he beat John Cena on RAW, and he’ll beat the Undertaker at Survivor Series to become the World Heavyweight champion. Big Show said he would be walking out of Survivor Series as the World Heavyweight champion. Hatton interrupted and booked the two of them against Degeneration-X tonight! Jericho went on a rant, insulting the England and the Queen. Hatton told Jericho to speak English. Hatton said Jericho was just a guy with a bad haircut, and told him to get out of his face. Jericho & Big Show threatened to attack Hatton until DX (Shawn Michaels & Triple H) made the save! Triple H said Jericho & Big Show never learn, and reminded everyone about Shaquille O’Neal & Bob Barker. HHH thanked Hatton for the match tonight, and not to worry about those two dimwits. Shawn Michaels said forget about tonight, why not right now! They knocked Jericho out of the ring, and Big Show prepared to take on all three guys. Big Show took off his jacket, put up his fists, and then slipped out of the ring. Big Show said it would be on his time!

Alicia Fox w/Jillian Hall defeated Kelly Kelly w/Gail Kim: WWE Diva’s champion Melina Perez watched the match on a monitor backstage..

Ricky Hatton & his son + John Cena: John Cena greeted Ricky Hatton and had some fun with his son…

Sheamus destroyed a local jobber (David Hintz): They said Jamie Noble was contomplating retirement after his match with Sheamus last week where he suffered a neck injury.

Ricky Hatton & The Bella Twins: The Bella Twins whored themselves out with their terrible acting, asking Ricky Hatton about what he was doing these days to get the plugs out of the way. Santino Marella showed up making jokes as usual, and Chavo Guerrero came in and claimed that Santino was sucking up to the guest host. Chavo challenged Hatton to a game of darts. Chavo threw a dart out of bounds, and Hatton got a bulleye! Chavo and Santino started arguing. Hatton said they should have a boxer vs. wrestler match tonight with Chavo against himself!

Josh Mathews & Mike “The Miz” Mizanin + Jack Swagger: The Miz bragged about being the only RAW Superstar to win at Bragging Rights. The Miz said his team will beat John Morrison‘s team at Survivor Series because he is AWESOME. Jack Swagger came in and said the Miz may be the captain, but he (Swagger) is the All-American American. Swagger talked about his promise to remain undefeated for the rest of the year. Swagger and the Miz continued to bicker, and Swagger said he is going to look so good tonight they will make him team captain!

Evan Bourne defeated Jack Swagger after distraction from the Miz:

Montel Vontavious Porter & Mark Henry & Kofi Kingston + Randy Orton & Legacy (Cody Rhodes & Ted DiBiase Jr.): MVP looks like a VIP… Mark Henry looks like a big, smelly, sweaty, unwanted, gorilla… Anyway, they introduced their Survivor Series team captain, Kofi Kingston! They thanked Kofi for picking them to be on his team, and praised him for taking a stand against Randy Orton. They all toasted themselves, and said Survivor Series would be straight up BALLIN’! Randy Orton came out with Legacy members Cody Rhodes & Ted Dibiase Jr. by his side. Orton said the three men were acting like they were on top of the world, but they are just a bunch of low-class street thugs. Orton said MVP was the definition of the common criminal, and Kofi should be in jail for what he did last week. Cody Rhodes said MVP looks “VIP” but his surroundings aren’t so “VIP.” Ted DiBiase said MVP’s bank account pales in comparison to his. MVP said “you mean your daddy’s bank account.” Orton said the only place they belong is the hood they came from. All six men square off and almost got into a fight but they went to commercial instead.

Randy Orton (w/Ted DiBiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes) defeated Mark Henry (w/Montel Vontavious Porter & Kofi Kingston): After the match, Kofi Kingston got some shots in on Randy Orton before Legacy members dragged Orton backstage in a furious fit..

Ricky Hatton defeated Chavo Guerrero: The boxer has to win by knockout, and the wrestler has to win by pinfall and submission.. Mostly boring match…

John Cena & Hornswoggle + DX (Triple H & Shawn Michaels): John Cena tried to talk sense into Hornswoggle, telling him to stop doing the DX stuff or else he will get sued and lose thousands of dollars. Hornswoggle ran away, and DX (Triple H & Shawn Michaels) came in for some dialogue with WWE champion Cena to hype the triple threat match at Survivor Series.. Michaels said they know Cena is getting Hornswoggle do wear DX gear to distract them. Hornswoggle showed up wearing Cena merchandise. Triple H said something didn’t smell right, and DX left the room. Hornswoggle took off his Cena gear and revealed a bunch of DX gear underneath! Hornswoggle started doing the DX crotch chop!

DX (Triple H & Shawn Michaels) defeated Jerishow (Chris Jericho & The Big Show): WWE champion John Cena joined Michael Cole & Jerry Lawler on commentary for the match.. Cena was boring on commentary.. This surprisingly boring match ended when the Big Show accidentally knocked out Jericho – allowing DX to pick up the victory! They announced that next week it would be DX vs. Jerishow vs. Cena and…. the Undertaker!