WWE Monday Night RAW 12 07 2009

December 7, 2009 – Dallas, Texas
Announcers: Michael Cole & Jerry “The King” Lawler

DARK MATCH: “The Masterpiece” Chris Masters defeated Alex Riley with the Masterlock..

Guest Host Mark Cuban: Ring announcer Justin Roberts introduced tonight’s guest host, Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban. Cuban came out of the audience, and they said he always sits with the fans. Cuban hyped the show, saying he was large and in charge all night long! Cuban set up a “showdown” between number one contender Sheamus and WWE champion John Cena. Cuban got the show started and then sat down in the front row to watch!

WWE champion John Cena defeated Carlito Colon: Midway through the match, Sheamus came out to the stage, but Mark Cuban walked up and blocked the path along with a team of security guards. In the ring, John Cena finished Carlito off with an Attitude Adjustment.. After the match, Cena got high fives from some of the Dallas Maverick players as well as the Bella Twins, who were whoring themselves out to the whole team..

Randy Orton & Legacy (Ted DiBiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes) + Mark Cuban: Randy Orton said he applauds Mark Cuban for taking charge of the show. Orton said he knows the “showdown” between Cena & Sheamus tonight will end in complete chaos. Orton said he doesn’t care who wins, because of something he (Cuban) was about to do for him (Orton). Orton said Cuban would lift the ban, so that he can get another shot at the WWE championship. Cuban from the front row shook his head and said it was not going to happen. Ted DiBiase said he knows better than anybody, rich people have pride, but that doesn’t mean they have to be stupid. DiBiase showed video from Survivor Series 2003 when Randy Orton RKO’d Mark Cuban! Cuban said Orton would NOT fight the winner of the Tables match at TLC! Cuban said Orton got LUCKY against Kofi Kingston last week, because the WWE refs are worse than the NBA refs. Cuban says he respects the fact that Orton is a competitor, so he has something set up for him tonight. Cuban booked Orton in a rematch with Kingston tonight, where he (Cuban) was going to be the referee! Cody Rhodes spoke up and said Cuban was just like his basketball team (Dallas Mavericks), because he was ALL TALK. Rhodes addressed the Mavericks players, asking if they wanted to do something in this arena besides lose in the playoffs. Rhodes challenged Cuban to get in the ring with him tonight, where if he (Rhodes) wins then Orton’s ban would be lifted.. Cuban suggested they wait until June after the Mavericks win the NBA championship because Legacy already has a match right now!

Legacy (Ted DiBiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes) defeated Evan Bourne & Primo Colon: After the match, Mark Cuban ejected Ted DiBiase & Cody Rhodes from the arena! A team of security guards came out and escorted the Legacy members out of the building.

HIGHLIGHT REEL: Sheamus retiring Jamie Noble…

Maryse Ouellet defeated Gail Kim: Kelly Kelly was the special guest ring announcer and sounded terrible.. Maryse pinned Gail Kim using the ropes for leverage and Kelly announced her as the winner. After the match, Maryse went after Kelly and said she forgot the part about being the next Divas champion. Kelly shoved Maryse, who shoved back, and they started to fight until Diva’s champion Melina Perez came out and chased Maryse away!

DX (Triple H & Shawn Michaels) + Hornswoggle: DX funny segment spreading some holiday cheer and plugging all of the holiday related DX merchandise. Shawn Michaels said he got Triple H a gift, the SD! vs. RAW 2010 video game. Triple H said it’s a great game, and he’s been playing it all week because they sent him one for free TOO. Triple H called Michaels a regifter. Triple H gave Michaels a gift too, and Hornswoggle jumped out wearing a DX shirt which included himself with HHH & HBK and “World’s Littlest DX Member” written on the back. Michaels said Hornswoggle has created a DX shirt and put it on WWEShop.com and he’s doing it even though it’s illegal! HHH & Michaels went into some terrible dialogue and then pulled out their scripts and yelled “who wrote this stuff?” Hornswoggle climbed a ladder and tried to get HBK’s hat from the top of the Christmas tree, but then jumped off onto DX! Hornswoggle grabbed the DX cowboy hat, put it on, then gave DX a couple crotch chops before running away!

HIGHLIGHT REEL: Sheamus beating up time-keeper Mark Yeaton…

Kofi Kingston defeated Randy Orton: RAW guest host Mark Cuban put on a referee shirt and jumped in the ring to referee the match. Kofi Kingston covered Randy Orton with a backslide and referee Cuban made a really fast three count to give Kingston the victory! After the match, Mark Cuban said he waited six years for payback and he got him! Cuban said it was 1-1 and it was time for a rubber match between Orton and Kingston at TLC!

HIGHLIGHT REEL: Sheamus winning the Breakthrough Battle Royal…

Mike “The Miz” Mizanin defeated “The World’s Strongest Man” Mark Henry to retain the WWE United States title: Mark Henry went head-first into the ring-post, and was groggy for the rest of the match.. The Miz finished Henry off with a DDT in the ring to retain his championship..

Hornswoggle & Eve Torres defeated Chavo Guerrero & Jillian Hall: Chris Masters showed up and joined Mark Cuban in the front row to watch the match (since he has an outstanding issue with Chavo Guerrero)…. After the match, Chavo Guerrero grabbed Hornswoggle by the beard and threatened to hurt him. Eve Torres begged Chavo to leave the little guy alone, so Chavo shoved him down and set his sights on Eve. Suddenly, Chris Masters jumped into the ring and took his shirt off to confront Chavo. Chavo poked Masters in the chest, and Masters started doing his pec-dancing routine. Chavo took a swing, but Masters ducked and put him in the Masterlock! Masters threw Chavo down and checked on Eve, who was very impressed with the pec-dancing. Hornswoggle was left in the ring laughing at the fallen Chavo Guerrero..

HIGHLIGHT REEL: Sheamus destroying Santino Marella…

Chris Jericho: Somebody did up a few dozen identical signs that read “Jericho Sucks” and distributed them around the arena.. probably the WWE. Jericho talked about all of the Slammy’s he was going to win next week, and claimed that he was bigger than RAW, bigger than SmackDown!, and transcends the WWE. Jericho hyped the TLC match at the TLC PPV, promising to retain the Unified Tag Team championships against DX.

Chris Jericho vs. DX (Triple H & Shawn Michaels) ended in a No Contest: Midway through the match, the referee was knocked out and the Big Show came out to help Chris Jericho. Big Show went after Shawn Michaels, until Triple H jumped in and bashed him with a chair! Big Show turned around and punched the chair into Triple H’s skull! Michaels grabbed a ladder from under the ring, but Jericho baseball slid it into his ribs! Big Show picked up the ladder and swung it at both HHH & HBK! Jerishow put both HHH & HBK between the ladder and Jericho bashed it repeatedly with a steel chair! Jericho grabbed the tag team belts and yelled “NEVER! NEVER! NEVER!” Jericho climbed to the top of the ladder and raised both belts above his head with Big Show standing below with his arms up too..

Mark Cuban + Sheamus + WWE Champion John Cena: Mark Cuban introduced Sheamus first, and then WWE champion John Cena. Cuban asked Sheamus why he thinks he will become champion on Sunday. Sheamus said it took Cena three years to become WWE champion, and it will only take him a few weeks to do it. Sheamus said he’s never been beaten, and he is obsessed with the sound of Cena crashing through a table. Cuban asked Cena the same question, and he just said “no comment.” Cuban asked if Sheamus was concerned with competing in a Tables match. Sheamus ran his mouth about destroying Cena and threatening to put him through a table twice and watch his backbone shatter. Sheamus said Cena has never faced anyone like him, and this Sunday he was gonna lose everything! Cena just sat there and said “no comment.” Cuban asked both men if they had something to say to their opponent. Cena said he had a question for Sheamus. Cena said he noticed Sheamus talked a lot, and hopes he realizes what he’s saying. Cena talked about his debut in 2002 and facing everybody in the WWE in the last seven years. Cena said he never went looking for a fight, but everyone came looking for him because he was the target. Cena said in seven years he has been beaten, battered and hospitalized. Cena said he’s been in arenas with thousands of people cheering him, and in arenas where thousands of people can’t stand him. Cena said he believes in everything he says because he is on another a level. Cena said he believes in hustle, loyalty, and respect, and in the right to say THE CHAMP IS HERE! Cena said a cheap-shot and a crash through a table only made him very very angry! Cena said this Sunday Sheamus either backs up what he says or he (Cena) will make Sheamus a footnote in WWE history. Cena said Sheamus impresses him, but not for one second does he intimidate him. Sheamus tipped over his table in the ring, so Cena tipped over his table too. Sheamus shoved Mark Cuban down to the mat, and Cena foolishly checked on him. Sheamus knocked Cena out with a Yakuza kick to the head! Sheamus set up a table in the corner of the ring and then kicked Cena in the head once more! Mark Cuban got to his feet and confronted Sheamus, then shoved him down on his butt! Sheamus was surprised, but got up and snarled back and Cuban. Sheamus kneed Cuban in the gut, and then bashed him through the table!!!! Suddenly four of the Dallas Mavericks players jumped the rail and Sheamus quickly retreated backstage…