March 7, 2011 – Dallas, TX Announcers: Michael Cole & Josh Mathews + Jerry “The King” Lawler [ REVIEWED BY BRAD DYKENS ]
IN THE RING The Undertaker: RAW opened with an appearance by the Undertaker, who came out to his new “there ain’t no grave that can hold my body down” theme song. Taker said at WrestleMania, two icons will do battle, and in the end there can only be one “last outlaw.” Taker said many feel that this is the year that the streak will be broken, and all of the years will finally catch up to him. Taker said there are some people who feel that Triple H is the one guy who has what it takes to end the streak. Taker reminded everyone of his two victories over Shawn Michaels at the last two WrestleMania’s. They showed a video package featuring highlights of both of those epic battles. Back live, Taker said there would be no excuses because the match will be No Holds Barred! Taker said the possibilities are endless, but there is one thing that is iron clad, and that is the end result. Taker repeated HHH’s words that if he ends the streak or he’ll die trying…. adding the warning “at WrestleMania… you will REST IN PEACE!”
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT: Randy Orton was fighting off three members of Nexus (David Otunga & Mason Ryan & C.M. Punk). Eventually Nexus got the upper hand and took Orton down. Punk said Orton managed to take out McGillicutty, but they are going to send Orton to a much worse place! They kicked his ass some more and then Punk gave him a Go-To-Sleep! Punk ordered his buddies to pick up Orton and drag him to the ring NOW!
IN THE RING The Nexus (C.M. Punk & David Otunga & Mason Ryan) & Randy Orton: After the commercial, the Nexus had Randy Orton in the ring and continued to assault him. Some referees showed up and sent Punk & Ryan packing so David Otunga could challenge Randy Orton to a match! Orton foolishly accepted.
SINGLES MATCH Randy Orton defeated David Otunga: The stipulation was that if David Otunga can win, he will legally be allowed to be in C.M. Punk’s corner at WrestleMania. Last week, Orton not only defeated Michael McGillicutty but he put him out of action! Orton hit Otunga with a sudden RKO to win the match! Mason Ryan ran down and attacked Orton and set him up for his finisher, but Orton hit him with a sudden RKO! Orton glared at Punk, who had come to ringside, before turning around and drilling Otunga with a running punt kick to the head! He’s written out of storylines now!
ANNOUNCEMENT: The Miz posted the following on his Tritter today; “out of protest for not getting the recognition I deserve, I am boycotting Raw tonight.” They’re suddenly embracing Twitter & Facebook.
SINGLES MATCH Christian defeated Brodus Clay (w/Alberto Del Rio & Ricardo Rodriguez): This match was scheduled to be Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio. Christian was looking for revenge, because Alberto was the one who put him on the shelf several months ago. Alberto came out with his NXT rookie, Brodus Clay (who recently lost to Johnny Curtis in the finals of NXT Season 4). Alberto cut his “destiny” promo and said he and Christian were going to fight, but not tonight, because first he’s going to have to beat his “little friend” Brodus Clay! Christian won but he was quickly attacked by Alberto after the match. Alberto put Christian in the dreaded armbar and yanked on it long enough!
REPLAY: They showed a clip of The Rock’s promo last week doing an anti-Cena rap.. they also plugged some Twitter messages exchanged this week between Rock and Cena. Did WWE buy stock in Twitter?
WWE DIVAS TITLE MATCH Eve Torres w/Gail Kim defeated Nikki Bella w/Brie Bella: During the match, Michael Cole got up on the announce table and said nobody wanted to see this match, because he has a huge announcement to make about WrestleMania. Josh Mathews pulled him down so the Diva’s could finish. Cole demanded they end the match soon. The referee spoiled the Bella’s attempt at “twin magic” (aka the switcheroo). Finally Eve won the match and retained her championship. Michael Cole got up and said “thank God that’s over! Coming up next is the main event! I’m going to tell the world who the special referee is for my match at WrestleMania!”
ANNOUNCEMENT: Snooki from the Jersey Shore will guest star on next week’s RAW. Wow, that one might be worth missing.
IN THE RING Michael Cole + JBL (John Bradshaw Layfield) + Stone Cold Steve Austin: They showed clips of Michael Cole announcing Jack Swagger as his trainer last week and Swagger putting Jerry Lawler in the Anklelock! Cole bragged about competing in his first ever match, at a WrestleMania. Cole held up a contract for someone to referee his match against Lawler at WrestleMania. Cole teased the name for a while, obviously over-hyping it, hinting that it would be Stone Cold Steve Austin. Cole got the people to chant “Austin! Austin!” and then called them fools! Cole announced that his real referee at WrestleMania will be none other than JBL! John “Bradshaw” Layfield came out in his stretch limo looking exactly the same as he did when he retired from the WWE. JBL cut a heel promo against the state of Texas, and about how he moved to New York City. JBL said nobody has ever debuted in the main event of WrestleMania (Editor’s Note: What about Lawrence Taylor?). JBL said he saw the sacrifices Cole made and called Jerry Lawler a bully. JBL said he hates bullys, and it’s wrong that the strong pick on the weak just because they can. JBL said he was proud of Cole for standing up to that bully. JBL said he knows with Jack Swagger training him, Cole will become a world class athlete. JBL said the match is just missing an impartial referee. JBL said he’s not just a multi-millionaire, he’s a man of integrity, and that’s why when he signs the contract he will be coming home. JBL said today is the day he starts his journey back to the main event of WrestleMania. Just as JBL was about to sign, there was a sound of broken class and Stone Cold Steve Austin the ring to a standing ovation. Austin was looking great as he hit all four corners to pose for the fans. JBL got between Austin and Cole and yelled at Austin. Austin kicked JBL in the gut and hit him with a Stone Cold Stunner! Austin threw a beer bash as Cole complained that he ruined HIS NIGHT! Austin poured beer on JBL before he noticed the contract laying in the ring. Cole started to cry and said “oh my God no!” Austin picked up the contract and spit beer on it, then asked the fans if he should sign it. Austin asked for a hell yeah, and he got a HELL YEAH! Austin signed the contract, making him the referee for the Cole vs. King match at WrestleMania. Cole whined and complained at ringside, begging Austin not to follow through with it. Austin took a beer over to Michael Cole and shook his hand before pouring two cans of beer over Cole’s head. Austin said “good luck on your match, brother!” Cole got up to walk out but Austin poured another beer onto him from up in the ring. JBL got to his feet and Austin gave him a beer and offered to toast. They knocked cans and drank, but Austin just planted JBL with another Stunner! Cole went nuts on the stage as Jack Swagger arrived to console him.. . . ..
REPLAY: They showed more clips of The Rock’s promo last week..
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT: Michael Cole complained about what happened and said he hates Stone Cold Steve Austin. Jack Swagger told Cole to focus on his match with the so-called King, and he’ll take care of Stone Cold – then threatened to break his ankle!
RINGSIDE SEGMENT: Jerry “The King” Lawler finally arrived and replaced Michael Cole on commentary along side Josh Mathews. Lawler said they just witnessed the greatest moment in television history. Way to over-sell it, King.
NON (WWE UNITED STATES) TITLE MATCH WWE United States champion Daniel Bryan defeated King Sheamus: A few minutes into the match, Sheamus took a tumble out of the ring and injured his ankle. The referee counted to ten and awarded the match to Daniel Bryan via a count out. Sheamus was frustrated about his recent bad luck. Sheamus admitted that he has been on a losing streak, but all that is going to change when he becomes the new United States champion. Sheamus said if he doesn’t beat Daniel Bryan for the title, he’ll QUIT! The champion accepted the challenge.
SINGLES MATCH C.M. Punk (w/Mason Ryan) defeated R-Truth by submission: They showed clips of what happened between the Nexus & Randy Orton earlier. Punk made Truth tap out to the Anaconda Vice! After the match, Punk directed Mason Ryan to destroy Truth. Ryan planted Truth with a devastating Shoulder-breaker!
VIDEO PACKAGE: Shawn Michaels talked about the Triple H/Undertaker match at WrestleMania. Shawn said his friendship with HHH has evolved over the years. Shawn said HHH has climbed every mountain, so he has to start making mountains to climb. Shawn said there is a darkness inside of HHH, and that’s why if anybody can end the streak it is HHH!
IN THE RING Vickie Guerrero + Dolph Ziggler: Even though she was fired a few days ago on SmackDown!, Vickie Guerrero made her way down to ringside to address some things. Excuse me! I said EXCUSE ME! Vickie said thanks to her negotiating efforts, she was there to introduce the newest member of the RAW roster…. former World Heavyweight champion, Dolph Ziggler!
SINGLES MATCH Dolph Ziggler (w/Vickie Guerrero) defeated John Morrison: Vickie joined in on commentary for the match. Jerry Lawler asked Vickie what her relationship was with Dolph after she threw him under the bus on SmackDown!. Vickie claimed it was strictly a business relationship. After the match, Vickie got in the ring to celebrate, trying to get close to Dolph, but he was obviously resisting it. An email came in from the Anonymous RAW General Manager, which was read by Jerry “The King” Lawler…. the G.M. said he DID hire Dolph Ziggler on RAW, but NOT Vickie Guerrero! The G.M. considers Vickie a polarizing figure, and she can have a job on RAW if she wins her match next week against Trish Stratus! Vickie flipped out. A team of security guards walked down and escorted Vickie out of the building!
REPLAY: They showed more clips of The Rock’s promo last week..
MOVIE TRAILER: Triple H’s crappy movie “The Chaparone”
REPLAY: They showed even more clips of The Rock’s promo last week..
IN THE RING John Cena + WWE champion Mike “The Miz” Mizanin: The crowd gave John Cena a mixed reaction. Cena said he struck a nerve with the Rock, who is very angry at him right now. Cena said he thought the Rock’s comments about him were funny, but when he talked about the Rock he got very angry. Cena said the Rock told him not to address him in rap, so tonight he will address him in hip hop. The crowd really booed Cena at this point. Cena did a hip hop rant, which sounds a lot like a long slow rap to me. It was all about the Rock. When he was done, the Miz showed up and knocked Cena out with a belt-shot to the skull! So the Miz wasn’t boycotting RAW after all. The Miz knocked Cena out again with a second belt shot to the head! The Miz got down on one knee and said, Cena, the Rock, and everybody else, have disrespected him for the last time! The Miz then did his own little rap, then looked in the camera and introduced himself to the Rock! The Miz said he was the star of WrestleMania while the Rock was just the HOST. The Miz said if the Rock has the guts to show up to RAW or WrestleMania he will blah blah blah blah and stick it straight up your candy ass… because I’m the Miz, and I’m AWESOME! He actually planted Cena with a Skull Crushing Finale and his version of the People’s Elbow right before he said “AWESOME”…