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HeadLocker — Jay Shannon

The Extreme Examination for 9/2/2008

Our resident philosopher, Jay Shannon, takes a look at the highlights (and lowlights) of the Tuesday Night Delight, ECW.

Unforgiven is this Sunday so tonight’s ECW was a hour long informercial for the next not-so-big PPV. With only five matches signed, this has to be the weakest PPV in recent history. Let’s take a look at all the action and drama from ECW.

The show started with another edition of the Dirt Sheet. It was typical Miz/Morrison bashing their guests. They made fun of Chavo, Matt (not Jeff) Hardy and others to waste a good 15 minutes of television time, including the grumble segment after the first break. The whole thing broke down into a slugfest with Evan Bourne and Tommy Dreamer thrown in the mix. It led to the announcement of the Eight Man Tag Match for the Main Event.

Grade: F

Jay’s Thoughts: I’m sorry but I hate these stupid talk segments. Roddy Piper was the only one who could ever do one of these with any level of talent. MVP, Miz and Morrison, Chris Jericho, etc… are all just pale imitators. I understand that WWE basically cleaned house with the talent roster, a few weeks back, and ECW doesn’t have enough guys to fill a full show. Bring back the old dance routines with the bimbos in skimpy clothes. At least those segments were hormonally interesting.

Super Crazy d The Crown Jewel Gavin Spears

This was a match to really make Super Crazy look good. Poor Gavin (don’t call me Shawn) Spears just looked lost out there. Super Crazy hit a Rolling version of the Figure Four Leglock that I don’t ever remember seeing before. Gavin got a few good moves in before Super Crazy nailed his trademark Springboard Moonsault to take the win.

Grade: B-

Jay’s Thoughts: I really like Super Crazy. I’m a fan of the original ECW, though I’m not quite as rabid as I used to be. Super Crazy can still rev up a crowd with the best of them. It’s a little sad to see Gavin thrown to the wolves. He deserves a better showing. He’s the Jamie Noble of ECW/Smackdown.

WWE ran a promo for the new Mr. Perfect DVD. That video collection will be released next Tuesday. It will have some of the best of Curt’s stuff from AWA, WCW and WWE. I know his son, Joe, is getting ready to come up from FCW. I’d love to see his WWE debut timed to be on the same day as his dad’s video release.

Ricky Ortiz d Ryan Braddock

Ricky put his winning streak on the line against Ryan Braddock. He didn’t have much to worry about. Braddock might be a decent wrestler but he was massively over-matched in this battler. Ortiz finished off Ryan with his Big Splash that he calls The Big O.

Grade: C

Jay’s Thoughts: I don’t know why I can’t warm up to Ricky Ortiz. He should be a great new star, like Kofi or C.M. Punk. Instead, he’s just a really stale talent. His finisher is rather dull and his pushiness to be a star is annoying. I want to see someone end his streak. Put him in there with Mark Henry.

The Raw Rebound was up next. It was time to rehash the whole Shawn Michaels/Chris Jericho feud. Shawn injured his arm when he fell out of the ring and twisted his arm on the landing. WWE is still pushing the match between the two men for Sunday. Their match, if it happens, should be one seriously bloody match.

ECW took a break before the main event.

Todd Grisham sent it to Minnesota, where Josh Matthews, Mr. Kennedy and Mickie James talked to the fans. This was just a modified version of last night’s report.

Back to wrestling. Todd Grisham and Matt Striker talked about Unforgiven. So far, there are only five matches scheduled. That has to be one of the slimmest cards in recent history. I can only hope some matches will be added, later.

Matt Hardy, Finlay, Tommy Dreamer and Evan Bourne d Miz, John Morrison, Chavo Guerrero and Mark Henry
8-Man Tag Match

The match started slowly but picked up near the end. All 8 men got the chance to shine. The end came when all four faces worked over Mark Henry. Evan nailed the Shooting Star Press on Mark. Tommy Dreamer then tagged in and hit a Frog Splash on the ECW Champ. Finlay tagged in and dropped his butt onto Mark’s chest. Matt put the cherry on top with the Twist of Fate. Matt claimed the victory for his team.

Grade: A

Jay’s Thoughts: This match was excellent. All 8 men looked fantastic. The final flurry with all the faces nailing their best moves was perhaps the best thing that ECW has shown in months. It off-set the lameness of the whole Dirt Sheet debacle.

Final Grade: B-

Final Thoughts: ECW runs so hot and cold. The new kids just don’t seem to have the enthusiasm or talent to make the show interesting. Evan Bourne (Matt Sydal) is the one exception. He is this year’s Kofi Kingston/C.M. Punk. He will likely hold the ECW title, eventually. He will then get a chance to move up to either Smackdown or RAW. Ortiz, Spears and Braddock will find themselves in the indies or over on TNA within the year, unless they re-adjust their styles.

–Jay Shannon
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