The Impact (8/6)Insight

HeadLocker — Jay Shannon
The Impact (8/6) Insight
Our resident philosopher takes a look at one of the wildest fist fights in wrestling history as he profiles this week’s TNA Impact.

The Main Event Mafia has been working to dominate TNA over the past year or so. Now, a new faction wants to take control. The World Elite would offer an alliance with the MeM, but was it all just a trick?

The show opened with Hernandez defeating Samoa Joe in the upset win of the year. Bobby Lashley made his career path clear to the Mafia. Mick Foley became the fourth Legends champion, taking the title from Kevin Nash in a tag team match.

This Week’s Episode:Powers Unite

Earlier in the day, a stretch limo pulled up in the parking garage. When the door opened, Kurt Angle and Eric Young exited, together. They embraced and walked into the arena.

The fireworks exploded as Mike Tenay and Don West welcomed the home audience to the show. They ran down the night’s card before the Main Event Mafia arrived. Kurt talked about a great injustice being done, last week. Kurt said that Foley’s win of the Legends belt wasn’t legit, due to Sting‘s interference. Kurt grumbled that Bobby Lashley wasn’t the legal man when the match ended. Kurt said the match was null and void. Kurt said that the TNA Board of Directors agreed the match was a sham but the decision would stand. However, Kevin Nash would be getting another shot at the title at Hard Justice. Nash would end the career of Mick Foley. Kurt then talked about forming an alliance…

Enter the World Elite. Eric, now sporting a shaved head, shook hands with the various Mafia members. Kurt stroked Eric’s ego. Eric, who looked for all the world like the late Crash Holly, suggested that the unified team of Mafia and Elite would take over TNA. Eric said his men were 100% dedicated to the cause. Eric went off on one of his boring anti-American rants. Eric blamed the fans and called for the “Cleansing” to begin.

JB talked with Mick Foley. Foley wasn’t surprised Eric’s actions. JB wanted to know what Foley planned to do. Foley said he was ready to go to war. The camera panned back and showed Sting and Bobby Lashley. The trio walked off together.

Lauren asked Daniels about Eric Young setting his sights on Daniels as the first target. Daniels went off on Eric, telling him to be a man. As Lauren talked about Eric having the other World Elite with him in the ring, Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley walked up and joked about being off tv for a month. Daniels took them to task for acting like “immature jack-asses”. Daniels invited teh Guns to accompany him to the ring.

Eric Young, along with Kiyoshi and Sheik Abdul Bashir, stood in the ring. Daniels, Sabin and Shelley came from the back.

Eric Young d Daniels

The Finish:

Eric rushed Daniels, only to strike the corner. Daniels dropped Eric with a pair of Running Fore-arms. Daniels then hit the Jumping Back Heel Kick to send Eric to the canvas. Daniels used a High Knee to send Eric crashing into the corner. Daniels placed Eric on the top rope and then slapped him. Daniels planted Eric with a Reverse Razor’s Edge. Eric kicked out at two. Daniels caught Eric with the Sit-Out (Anderson) Spinebuster. Eric, again, kicked out at two. Daniels dropped Eric with the Uranage Chokeslam and went to the high rent district. Daniels missed with the BME. Daniels tried to lock in the Angel’s Wings but Kiyoshi rushed into the ring as Bashir distracted the ref. Kiyoshi blew the Kabuki/Muta Mist into Daniels’ eyes. This allowed Eric to Piledrive Daniels to take the win.

Grade: A-

Jay’s Thoughts: I’m just not sure how I like the “new” Eric Young. I know that it’s just a matter of time until the World Elite turns on Eric and he has to come crawling back to the fold. Eric is a solid wrestler but his in-ring personas are just weak. Re-hashing the Anti-Americans gimmick is always risky. When it was first done by Lance Storm and crew, America was in uber-patriotic mode. Now, the whole foreign contingency thing falls a bit flat. I commend Daniels for a fantastic match, even though he had to job to E.Y.

Don and Mike talked about the big 8-man tag match that would highlight the show. Also, Hernandez was scheduled for a big interview, his first solo one in years. The main event was Sting v Brutus Magnus.

Lauren talked with Beer Money and Team 3D. Robert Roode tore into Eric Young for his behavior. Roode talked about riding the roads with Eric, even before TNA began. Roode wouldn’t allow Eric Young to determine his future. Brother Ray took the stick and talked about how p*ssed off they were at the World Elite for their cheating, last week. Ray rambled in a border-line obscene rant about the British Invasion.

Note from Jay: New Japan, a member of the NWA, does not recognize the title change of the IWGP World Tag belts. They claim the match was not sanctioned by New Japan. On the official NWA Website, Team 3D is still recognized as the IWGP tag champions.

The British Invasion entered the Impact Zone for the 8-man match. Doug Williams and Rob Terry would represent the triad. They were joined by the TNA World Tag champions, Booker T and Scott Steiner. Their opponents were: Team 3D (Brother Ray and Brother Devon) and Beer Money (Robert Roode and James Storm).

Doug Williams, Rob Terry, Scott Steiner and Booker T d Brother Ray, Brother Devon, James Storm and Robert Roode
8-Man Tag Team Match

The Finish:

Terry reversed an Irish Whip, sending Roode crashing into the corner. Roode got the boot up and Terry staggered backwards. Roode flew off the middle turnbuckle to deliver a modified Flying Neckbreaker. Roode went for a pin but Steiner and Williams rushed the ring. The match broke down into total chaos, as all 8 men battled in the middle of the ring. After the ring cleared, Ray and Williams were left to battle. Ray Scoop Slammed Doug Williams and called for Devon to climb to the top rope. Devon flew off to deliver the Wazzup!Ray called for the tables, which brought the entire World Elite faction running down to the ring. Daniels, Sabin and Shelley rushed to the ring. People were fighting all over the place. kevin nash then came to the ringside area and started baashing people. Mick Foley then came out to attack Nash. Kurt came out to fight, as did Sting. Samoa Joe then fan down to protect Kurt Angle. Bobby Lashley jumped Joe to protect Sting! In all the craziness, Rob Terry hit a Chokebomb on Robert Roode, after Traci Brooks distracted her old boss (Roode).

Grade: A

The fight continued on the floor as just about everyone on the roster was throwing punches, kicks and the kitchen sink at each other. Mike Davis brought the full security squad with him, along with numerous refs, to try and break up the melee. They couldn’t stop the feuding, so TNA went to break.

After the break, everyone was still beating the daylights out of each other. The bell ringer guy had to be exhausted, after ringing the bell a good dozen times. A security camera , on the outside, picked up the craziness in the parking lot. Sting threw Kurt into a table. Kurt reverrsed an Irish Whip and sent Sting into the same table. The Brits and Beer Money fought in another area of the parking lot. The GUns and Daniels trashed Kiyoshi, back in the ring. Daniels hit the BME. The camera cut to the locker room where Samoa Joe and Bobby Lashley fought. This was absolutely insane! Tash cans were flying in the parking lot. Doug Williams took a double can shot to the face. In the ring, Eric Young, Kiyoshi and Bashir were being annihilated by the Guns and Daniels. This was one of the longest fights in wrestling history. The local cops showed up to maintain order. The final moments of this craziness turned into a bad episode of Reno 911. TNA went to another break.

Jay’s Thoughts: Conside me a big time mark on this one, but Man that was fun. Total chaos just works for me, sometimes. The 8-Man match was really good but the ending took it to the next level. I really haven’t seen a good barroom brawl like that since my days hanging out at The Old Top Rail, a hillbilly bar, back home in Dallas. Around 3 A.M., the old boys would have a few too many beers and all Hell would break loose.

Mike came back to talk about how those last two segments were the wildest that he’d ever seen in all his years in wrestling

Alissa Flash (aka Cheerleader Melissa/Raisha Saeed) came out for a tag team battle. Flash’s partner was Traci Brooks. Traci removed her jacket and nearly exploded out of her tight top. (I smiled). Taylor Wilde and Sarita served as the Face Team for the battle.

Sarita & Taylor Wilde d Traci Brooks & Alissa Flash

The Finish:

Flash drove Wilde into the mat with the Curb Stomp. Wilde fought back when Traci tagged in . The two women hit Crossbodies on each other. Wilde kicked free and got to her corner. Sarita threw dropkicks on both of her opponents. Flash caught Sarita in a Full Nelson but Sarita was able to twist around into wild submission move. It was like a Crippler Crossface combined with an Octopus. Traci made the save but Wilde took her out. Sarita Floated Over a Scoop Slam into a Spinning Small Package. Sarita scored the pin.

Grade: B+

Jay’s Thoughts: I’m glad to see Flash get out of the middle eastern garb. She’s actually quite the lovely young lady. I’m not sure why the heck Traci is with the Main Event Mafia. She’s never actually held a title, let alone a World title. It would have been better booking to put Taylor Wilde in the group. She’s cute, perky and has held the World title, twice. About the match itself, 3 out of the 4 were decent. Traci is just window dressing. Her wrestling ability, which has always been mediocre, has fallen to just above rookie status. The truth is, most men (myself included) could care less if she can actually wrestle. They are just waiting for the old “wardrobe malfunction”. That ain’t gonna happen…darn it.

After the match, Flash and Traci jumped the winners. Flash drove Sarita into the canvas with a modified Michinoku Driver. Traci took out Wilde with a Suplex.

TNA ran a video package for the new Revolution of Wrestling. They “borrowed” D-X’s “Are You Ready?” tag line.

Lauren talked with The Beautiful People. Angelina Love will fight, next week, in a Four Corners match. The other three fighters will be: ODB, Tara and Awesome Kong. The Beautiful People grambled about ODB. Love challenged ODB and Cody Deaner to a mixed-up tag match. Velvet Sky would be Love’s partner. TNA went outside, where Kip James grouched about having to clean up the mess, after the huge parking lot battle, earlier. TNA went to break.

Lauren interviewed A.J. Styles. She wondered if Styles could concentrate after all the insansity of earlier. Styles said he was totally focused on taking the second match against Matt Morgan to go after the World title at Hard Justice. Mke and Don ran down the updated Hard Justice card. Don then promo’d a few uipcoming shows.

Mike then sent it to a video package about Hernandez. Mike then talked with Hernandez. They touched on Hernandez’s neck injury. Mike asked Hernandez about his background. Hernandez’s dad was military. Hernandez was a football player before starting wrestling. Mike mentioned how upset Hernandez’s dad was when Konnan and LAX threatened to burn the US flag. Mike wanted to know how things were going with Homicide. Hernandez said that they were still Familia but they had grown apart. Hernandez was sure that they would reunite to take the tag titles, again…someday.

Lauren talked to Homicide. Homicide blew off his partner and started pushing his X-Division title match against Samoa Joe. Homicide wasn’t impressed with the Nation of Violence or Taz. Homicide said that 187 is much bigger than 13.

Matt Morgan walked backstage. He would face A.J. Styles in the second of their Best of Three series.

TNA looked back at the Morgan/Styles battle from last week. That led to Morgan’s arrival for the match. He wore his DNA of TNA Helix robe. The crowd was rather nasty to The Blueprint. The jeers turned to cheers as A.J. Styles made his way from the back.

Matt Morgan d A.J. Styles
Best of Three Series for a World Title shot — Match 2

The Finish:

Morgan choked Styles on the top rpe. Morgan hit the Running Leg Lariat on the ropes. Morgan then used the boot to choke Styles. Morgan hit the Guillotine Leg Drop. Back in the ring, Morgan tried for a Chokeslam. Styles Elbowed his way free. Morgan tried for a second Chokeslam. Styles flipped over and hit an Enziguri. Morgan reversed an Irish Whip but ate a boot on the run-in. Styles tried for the Tornado DDT but Morgan shoved Styles off. Styles nailed the Pele but only got a two. Styles couldn’t belie it. Styles pounded on Morgan’s skull and went to the otuside. He went to the top rope but abandoned the idea when he saw Morgan coming at him. Styles dropped to the apron and then hit the Slide-Thru Dropkick to the shins of Morgan. Morgan twisted his knee. Styles went for the 450 Splash but Morgan got out of the way. Styles tried for the Wheelbarrow Bulldog but Morgan spun around and dropped Styles over the top rope. Morgan nailed the Hell-a-vator to even the series at one each

Grade: A-

Jay’s Thoughts: I like these matches. Morgan is working into a decent mid-carder. I doubt that he will ever actually hold gold in TNA but he just might surprise me (and just about everyone else). Styles, of course, continues to be one of the best on the roster.

TNA ran a quick promo piece for “The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero. Thanks to a new friend, Stephen, I learned that this is the former Elijah Burke’s (of ECW) new persona. The Pope will debut at Hard Justice.

JB talked with Kurt Angle, who seemed to be leaving. Kurt didn’t want to deal with all the chaos. JB then found Abyss in the shadows. Abyss was freaked out by the $50,000 bounty placed on his head by Dr. Stevie. Abyss noticed that JB was carrying a hammer. Before Abyss could find out if JB was going to attack him, Consequences Creed came up to confront the Monster about his recent attack on Jay Lethal. Jay jumped Abyss from behind. Lethal Consequences tried to collect the bounty, only to get devastated by the freaked out Abyss.

TNA ran another “Are You Ready” video promo piece.

Sting walked backstage. He would face Brutus Magnus in the main event…next.

Brutus was flanked by Doug Williams and Rob Terry. The former UK Gladiator took in the negative reaction of the fans, seeming to gain strength from it. Sting then came out with his baseball bat. There are rumors running wild that Sting may be winding down his career, either at Hard Justice or Bound For Glory.

Sting d Brutus Magnus

The Finish:

Brutus had Sting trapped in the corner, as the show continued. Brutus grabbed Sting’s leg. Sting was able to hit the Enziguri. Sting then “Hulked Up” and threw hard fists. Sting went for the Stinger Splash but Brutus got the boots up. Brutus flew off the ropes and Sting caught him. Sting slapped on the Scorpion Deathlock. Brutus had no choice but to tap out.

Grade: A-

Brutus tried to jump Sting but Sting saw him coming. Sting blasted Brutus in th corner. The World Elite rushed to the ring to mug Sting in a 6-on-1 assault. Bobby Lashley and Mick Foley rushed down to protect The Icon. The Main Event Mafia rushed out to the ring. Foley and Lashley were getting dominated in the ring. The crowd shrieked in horror at the massive mugging of the trip of hereos. hernandez came out carrying a Bruiser Brody-like chain. Everyone bailed out to the floor. Hernandez was now a member of…The Resistence!

Jay’s Thoughts: The match was really short, but superb. Magnus has been overlooked since his arrival in TNA> Sting is on his possible last run with the company, so he needs solid mid-carders to help push him…one last time. Brutus reminds me of a cross between Lance Storm and Ludvig Borga. He is a no-nonsense, straight-ahead battler that does his best. Sting is the same way.

Final Grade: B+

Final Thoughts: The chaotic mega-fight was unique and wild. Kudos to TNA for finally doing something different. They have relied on the past for far too long. The matches on this week’s show were somewhat tame but acceptable. Morgan and Styles stole the show, for sure. TNA is in a major state of transition, right now. The next few weeks and months should be quite interesting to watch.

–Jay Shannon
[email protected]
(8/10/09)