IN THE RING SmackDown! General Manager Vickie Guerrero + World Heavyweight Champion Edge + John Cena: Good lord, Vickie Guerrero on live TV. Vickie introduced her husband, the new World Heavyweight champion, Edge! The previous night Edge lost the WWE championship and won the World championship in consecutive Elimination Chamber matches. Edge said that the “R” in Rated R Superstar stands for REMARKABLE, RESPLENDANT, or REALLY REALLY SMART. Edge said after he lost the WWE championship he could have packed it in, but for him, failure is not an option. Edge said he took matters into his own hands. Edge said he was a living miracle. Edge said Jesus turned water into wine and he (Edge) turned the WWE championship into the World championship. Vickie explained that last night when Stephanie went to the hospital with Shane, she (Vickie) became the highest ranking WWE official in charge. Vickie proudly explained that when Kofi Kingston became physically unable to compete, she had to find a deserving replacement. Vickie tried to justify why nobody else was more deserving than her husband to be inserted into the match. Vickie said she talked to the board of directors and declared Edge the NEW World Heavyweight champion! The crowd booed and Vickie screamed “EXCUSE ME?” and added that you may not like it but each and every one of you will accept it! Edge & Vickie started making out in the ring until former champion John Cena showed up to end the face-sucking. Cena congratulated Edge & Vickie for pulling it off last night and admitted that Edge won fair and square. Cena said the “R” in Rated R Superstars stands for REALLY REALLY LUCKY, or RIGHT place RIGHT time, or his favorite – REMATCH! Edge said nobody has ever competed in two Elimination Chamber matches and he isn’t going to compete for a week, maybe a month. Edge said if Cena wants to see him or Vickie they will be on SmackDown!. Cena told Edge to go back to SmackDown! and tell Funaki & Festus he said hello. Cena said he does have an official rematch. Edge said he has a history with Cena, and remembered when he cashed in his first money in the bank on Cena, and the time when he invaded the Cena home and knocked out John Cena Sr.. Edge said “CHAMP IS HERE” while doing the You Can’t See Me thing. Cena grabbed Edge and said Edge can’t run, they are going to fight and he is going to hurt Edge.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: Shane McMahon invited Randy Orton to meet him in the ring to settle this thing until one of them isn’t moving. Shane told Orton to come alone for an unsanctioned fight. Shane said one way or another, this ends tonight!
SIX MAN TAG TEAM MATCH William Regal & Legacy (Ted DiBiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes) defeated C.M. Punk & Cryme Tyme (Shad Gaspard):
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT: Stephanie McMahon yelled at big brother Shane for challenging Randy Orton after being in the hospital last night. Stephanie begged him to wait until next week, but Shane was adament that it would END tonight!
IN THE RING Chris Jericho + “Rowdy” Roddy Piper: Chris Jericho told the Academy not to vote Mickey Rourke to win the “Best Actor” Oscar. Jericho said there are some legends who needs to be shut down and shut up for good! Jericho said the truth hurts, but was quickly interrupted by WWE Hall of Famer, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper! Piper said he was going to shoot with Jericho on this one. Piper said he has watched Jericho his entire career and liked him. Piper said Jericho always said what was on his mind and had the guts to come in the ring and back it up. Piper asked “what happened?” Piper said Jericho gets on TV and runs his mouth calling out all the legends. Piper said Jericho USED to be entertaining. Piper stole Jericho’s quote and told him, “PLEASE, SHUT THE HELL UP!” Jericho told Piper to dance like a puppet on a string. Piper yelled “I’m not finished yet!” Piper said Mickey Rourke was his friend and he watched “the Wrestler” and cried. Piper said the movie is about the honor and respect they have for everyone. Piper said the movie is about the pain – physically and emotionally – and most of all why they do what they do for the thrill of performing. Piper said Ric Flair was right when he said WE LIVE FOR THIS! Piper said people still come up to him and say they remember when he slapped Mr. T. Piper said people tell him they watched with their grandparents as he (Piper) shaved Adrian Adonis’ head. Piper remembered participating in the 2007 Royal Rumble at Madison Square Garden and called it the thrill of a lifetime. Piper was very choked up for this entire promo, by the way. Piper said he has one hip, and he hurts all the time, but as long as the people say so, he will crawl down on his hands and knees to give them one more memorable moment because OLD SCHOOL IS COOL. Piper offered to shake Jericho’s hand but Jericho just kicked Piper in the leg and then kicked him in the ribs. Jericho screamed “you want respect? CRAWL! CRAWL! CRAWL!” before leaving the ring. Jerry Lawler said that it was the worst thing he’s seen on RAW in all his years. Yeah, right!
BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW: Todd Grisham interviewed Randy Orton about Shane McMahon’s challenge. Orton said he has no problem fighting Shane, but was offended by the implication that he can’t do it without Rhodes & DiBiase. Orton said if Shane wants this fight to be over when someone isn’t moving, well he can make that happen.
SINGLES MATCH Kane defeated Jamie Noble: Jamie Noble said WrestleMania was a beautiful thing. Noble said he’s never been in a Money in the Bank match. Noble said he wanted a spot on WrestleMania 25, saying Chavo Guerrero only lasted nine seconds last year. Kane (the man who defeated Chavo last year) interrupted Noble’s rant and destroyed Noble in sixteen seconds..
IN THE RING John Bradshaw Layfield + Shawn Michaels: JBL paid for this time on RAW to make an “historic announcement.” JBL said as of last night Shawn Michaels is no longer his employee. JBL said his people have written Michaels a very large check for everything he was owed. JBL said Michaels got his likeness, image, and his name – and he is also now financially stable. JBL said he could care less. JBL said he has more money than Shawn Michaels will ever have. JBL said he thought he had a date with destiny at WrestleMania in Houston, but after No Way Out he had an epiphany. JBL said he realized his goals were too small. JBL said he has a date with destiny in Houston to end the 16-0 streak by the Undertaker at WrestleMania. JBL said he will end the streak and prove that he is the greatest wrestler of all time! Shawn Michaels interrupted and it was clear that he found his smile again. Michaels said he had an epiphany last night, too. Michaels said he was free at least, thank God, he was free at last! Michaels said a month ago a man said to him that it was “hell trying to get to heaven” and that man was the Undertaker – and that man was right. Michaels said he was living heaven on earth, and made a case for him facing the Undertaker at WrestleMania. JBL said that being able to pay his bill have caused a resurgence in Shawn’s manhood. JBL said beating the Undertaker at WrestleMania was HIS destiny, not Shawn’s. Shawn challenged JBL to a match next week where the winner earns the right to challenge the Undertaker’s undefeated streak at WrestleMania. JBL said “I accept.” Shawn said it looks like they are doing business one more time. Shawn poked JBL in the chest and said it was going to be different this time! Shawn said JBL will be lucky if he even makes it to WrestleMania!
GRUDGE MATCH Rey Mysterio defeated Mike Knox: I’m begging someone to challenge Mike Knox to a hair-vs.-beard match!
WWE WOMENS TITLE MATCH Melina Perez defeated Beth Phoenix (w/Santino Marella & Rosa Mendez) to retain the WWE Women’s title: Beth Phoenix distracted the referee, while Santino Marella & Rosa Mendez put the boots to Melina at ringside. Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, and Candice Michelle ran down to take out Santino and Rosa! Meanwhile Melina recovered and rolled up Beth in the ring for the 1-2-3 to retain the WWE Women’s championship!
HALL OF FAME ANNOUNCEMENT: They announced that The Funk Brothers will be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame! They will be inducted by “The American Dream” Dusty Rhodes the night before WrestleMania 25!
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT: Stephanie McMahon was shown talking to someone on the phone worrying about big brother Shane and told them to hurry and get there as fast as they can!
UNSANCTIONED FIGHT Shane McMahon vs. Randy Orton: The fight started out hot and heavy and spilled out of the ring throughout the arena. After 10 minutes of insanity, Shane knocked out Orton with the ring bell and set up for a coast-to-coast after placing a folding chair in front of Orton’s face. Shane went to the top rope, but was attacked by Ted DiBiase & Cody Rhodes! The Legacy members destroyed Shane, as Randy Orton recovered and patted his men on the back. Orton got a crazed look on his face and then lined up and punted Shane straight in the head! Stephanie ran down all hysterical with a trainer as Orton looked on with his assailants. Orton walked over and bent over next to the McMahons as Stephanie begged him to be reasonable. Orton went one step too far and gave Stephanie a devastating RKO in the middle of the ring! Suddenly Triple H (Stephanie’s husband) ran down and the Legacy members quickly retreated. Triple H held his wife’s limp hand and started to furiously “HULK UP” while looking at Randy Orton up on the stage! That was freaking intense!!!