Who Should Be Raw GM?

HeadLocker — Jay Shannon
Who Should Become General Manager of Raw?
Our resident philosopher sizes up the possible replacements for the exiting Vickie Guerrero.

Vickie Guerrero recently quit her position as the GM of Raw. The storyline was that she was tired of being humiliated by the fans and other WWE superstars. The honest truth is she wanted to dedicate more time to her kids. I respect her for walking away from such a high profile position for her family. With Vickie gone, Raw has an opening for a new General Manager. I thought it might be fun to run down the possible candidates and try and figure out who, if anyone, will take over the reigns of the Crimson Flagship.

Stephanie McMahon:

The Billion Dollar Princess has turned into one hot mama, with a temper as scorching as her looks. She was in charge of the show until Randy Orton hit the Rope-Assisted DDT on her, a few months back. Steph could make life a living Hell for Legacy, and a few other heels, as well. She would also get to spend a great deal more time with her hubby, Triple H. The main objection that she might be facing is the same thing that caused Vickie to give notice, her kids. Would Stephanie want to Run the Roads anymore? I think she might be a short-term run as the Captainette of the Ship, but, long-term, someone else will get the nod.

Odds of becoming the new GM (long-term): 100 to 1

William Regal:

Regal had a run as the GM, last year. He caused a great deal of heat, during his administration. The main issue that might keep Regal out of the Big Chair is his past history with the company. Regal has already been suspended, twice, for failures with the Wellness Program. I have to think that the WWE won’t risk putting Regal in such a high-profile spot. Regal’s been tested in a few higher profile matches, as of late, but he’s not getting near the push he got before. Regal will raise a ruckus about deserving the spot but I don’t think he’s going to get it.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 500 to 1

Chavo Guerrero:

Raw was hinting that Chavo might take over the show, before Vickie resigned. Chavo’s in-ring career is certainly beginning to wind down. Chavo could easily step into Aunt Vickie’s shoes (there’s such a demented storyline there, somewhere). Chavo’s character is just sleazy enough to pull off the role as Heel GM. He could also get in the middle of things, if needed. Chavo has never gotten into trouble with the Powers-that-be, to the best of my knowledge. He’d be a great choice if Raw wants another Heel in charge.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 2 to 1

Shane McMahon:

The Boy Wonder of Wrestling has matured into a decent businessman. He does a ton of work, behind the scenes, to keep the company moving in the right direction. Would he be willing to give that up, even temporarily, to take back an on-screen role? I kind of doubt it. Shane would make a decent “Boss” but he’s got far too much on his plate, right now, to return to the bright lights and craziness of a weekly on-air role.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 200 to 1

Teddy Long:

Long has been the most successful GM in the history of the WWE. He ran things on Smackdown, until he suffered a (storyline) heart attack. He then became second banana to Vickie Guerrero, pushing her wheelchair around and doing all the jobs Vickie didn’t want to do. Teddy then got “promoted” to running the show over on ECW. When Vickie left Smackdown for Raw’s GM spot, Teddy stepped up and took over the Blue Brand. Teddy has served well on Fridays and I’m not sure that Creative would want to move him to Raw. He would, however, have the best odds of getting the leadership spot on Mondays, in my opinion.

Odds of becoming the new GM: Even Money

Ric Flair:

He is likely the most recognized wrestler, this side of Hulk Hogan. He’s been playing a secondary role on Raw since losing to Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania XXIV. Flair’s pizazz would work well as a face GM. He would do his best to torture every heel on the roster. He could also do a power play heel switch easier than just about anyone in the business. Flair’s future in the WWE has been somewhat questionable, as of late. With Ring of Honor and TNA courting the “Nature Boy”, it’s hard to say if he would settle for a figurehead position.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 25 to 1

Shawn Michaels:

The Heartbreak Kid was heart-broken after losing to The Undertaker. He hasn’t been seen since the loss. Shawn’s career is on it’s last legs, due to so many years of bodily abuse. Shawn could return as either a face or heel GM. The main problem that I see on Raw is Triple H. Could Shawn effectively control his old D-X Running Buddy? It would seem rather doubtful. Shawn might make a flashy GM, but the fans would reject him worse than Mike Adamle (and that’s saying something).

Odds of becoming the new GM: 250 to 1

John Bradshaw Layfield:

JBL took a powder after a humiliating 28-second loss to Rey Mysterio at Wrestlemania 25. He has kept a pretty low profile since his exit. He’s done some commenting on financial matters and worked on a few of his outside interests. JBL has the perfect mind-set to be a GM. He knows how to be successful in business, which would translate well into a GM spot. The only issue is whether JBL would want to step back into the spotlight, especially in a leadership position like the GM. He can make a great deal more money outside of the wrestling business than he ever would as the GM. I have to think JBL would take a pass on this one.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 50 to 1

Now that I’ve run down the most likely candidates, it’s time to bring out the dark horses and longshots…

Dusty Rhodes:

A little Texas Justice just might shape up Monday nights. The Dream could be a total nightmare for several heels, including his youngest son. Dusty knows the ins and outs of wrestling better than almost anyone out there today. He’s spent most of the last few years working with the writing team, primarily on ECW. With both Dustin (Goldust) and Cody being on the Raw brand, it is very unlikely that Big Dust would take over control. He might step in to take over Smackdown, should Teddy Long go to Mondays.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 2000 to 1

Tiffany:

The Vicious and Delicious ECW GM is far too wet-behind-the-ears to get called up to the big dance, just yet. Tiffany can rule the roost when the barnyard is nearly empty but she’d have a heck of a time running things on Raw. She might work her way up to the Flagship, over time, but right now she’s more suited to Cap’n a rowboat.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 2500 to 1

Hornswoggle:

This would be the absolute worst move that the WWE could do. Hornswoggle was cute and adorable as the “son” of Finlay. As the General Manager of Raw, the ratings would take a beating worse than the Freshman Nerd at the hands of the Football Team. Hornswoggle’s character is barely understandable. If lil’ Horny were to take over Raw, the show would spiral into total chaos. The comedy schtick would grow stale by the Hour Turner moment of week two, if not week one. I just can’t imagine that Vince would green light this idea.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 5,000 to 1

Ricky Steamboat:

The Dragon got a huge pop during his recent run in the WWE. The Hall of Fame superstar knows the in and out of the business and would make a great positive role model as the GM. I’m not sure if Ricky wants to commit to a full-time schedule, especially since he’s helping to train his son and others for future careers.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 7500 to 1

Roddy Piper:

Piper, like Steamboat, made a few appearance around Wrestlemania. Piper has been a tremendous fan favorite, even when he was at the height of his heeldom. Piper could really lay down the law and keep the faces and heels, alike, in line. Piper’s health has been a concern for years, so it’s doubtful that he could stand up to a weekly touring schedule. He’d be amazing as GM, but the rigors of Running the Roads would likely be just a tad too much for the “Hot Rod”.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 10,000 to 1

Jim Ross:

He’s a Vice-President, behind the scenes. He’s also the voice of Smackdown. If he were to give the same effort into being GM that he does as being one of the top announcers, he’d go down in history as the best GM, ever. I really don’t think the “Good Ol’ JR” character would translate well into the suit and tie circle. Making him the GM could actually damage the character that he’s spent over two decades creating. I just can’t imagine that he would risk killing his character.

Odds of becoming the new GM: 500,000 to 1

In Conclusion: There are a dozen other names that sprang to mind. From “Stone Cold” Steve Austin to Harvey Wippleman, they all ran through my warped little mind. The list above is a combination of “most likely” and the ones that I think could pull off the job. Personally, I know what my choice would be:

Raw becomes the first WWE show to abandon the concept of a General Manager.

Since that’s not likely to happen, Raw just might roll out the new GM on the big 3-For-All on Monday.

Peace

— Jay Shannon
[email protected]
(6/14/09)