WWE Monday Night RAW 10 13 2008

Anaheim, California, 2008 – October 13, 2008
Announcers: Michael Cole & Jerry “The King” Lawler

Mike Adamle & Chris Jericho: Chris Jericho said when Mike Adamle makes a promise to him he has to keep it. Jericho scolded Adamle for making the Cyber Sunday match and letting the fans vote for the guest referee. Adamle told Jericho he would choose Batista’s opponent tonight and Batista would choose Jericho’s opponent. Jericho said he would go over his head and call Shane and Stephanie McMahon. Adamle said that the McMahons turn their phone off during the broadcast. Jericho stormed out of the room on a mission.

Chris Jericho + Shawn Michaels: Chris Jericho came out and complained about the fans being able to pick a referee for his match at Cyber Sunday between Shawn Michaels, Randy Orton and Stone Cold Steve Austin. Jericho protested and impored Shane & Stephanie McMahon to abolish these stipulations as soon as possible. Shawn Michaels came out and said he wasn’t going to beg for votes but instead attacked Jericho on the spot. Jericho quickly retreated backstage, but came back with a microphone. Jericho came back and said he has decided that Batista will wrestle Shawn Michaels tonight!

Kane & Mark Henry w/Tony Atlas defeated Rey Mysterio & Matt Hardy: Kane tried for a post match assault, but Rey Mysterio fought back and knocked Kane out of the rinG for a POP!

Todd Grisham & Batista: Batista said he’s very aware of the game Chris Jericho is trying to play. Batista said Jericho knows he has a lot of pent up rage. Batista said he’s going to beat Jericho to the punch.

John Bradshaw Layfield + Charlie Haas (aka Haas Hogan): John Bradshaw Layfield came out and cut promo about being rich and insulted poor people while complaining about the Stock Market problems. ZZZZzzzzzzzzz. JBL said that he was a Real American, but then he was interrupted by the sounds of “Real American” followed by the appearance of Charlie Haas dressed at Hulk Hogan – aka HAAS HOGAN!

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Haas Hogan (Charlie Haas): It was good while it lasted. Jerry “The King” Lawler said that JBL has no sense of humor but felt disrespected.

Todd Grisham & Johnny Knoxville: Todd Grisham interviewed Johnny Knoxville (and some other guy), who was sitting at ringside. Grisham showed pictures of the Jackass guys making fun of the Great Khali but they claimed they had nothing to do with it.

Randy Orton: They showed a video of John Cena recovering from surgery and comments from co-workers saying how great of a person Cena is. Randy Orton came out and asked why nobody was saying nice things about him while HE is out with an injury. Orton told fans not to vote for him to referee at Cyber Sunday because he doesn’t want to risk injury when he’s so close to returning to action.

Batista vs. Shawn Michaels ended in a No Contest: Before the match, Chris Jericho came on the big screen and said that he forgot to mention that it would be a Lumberjack match! Lumberjacks included mostly heels; Mark Henry, Tony Atlas, Gene Snitsky, Mike Knox, Bam Neely, Deuce, Ted DiBiase Jr., Cody Rhodes, Manu, Chavo Guerrero, William Regal, Randy Orton, and John Bradshaw Layfield. The match ended when all the Lumberjacks attacked Batista & Shawn Michaels, but they fought back and managed to take out all of the Lumberjacks together! After the dust cleared, Batista and Shawn Michaels shook hands in a show of mutual respect.

Santino Marella & Beth Phoenix + Johnny Knoxville + Hornswoggle + ?????? (Chris from Jackass) + Big Dick Johnson + The Boogeyman + The Great Khali & Ranjin Singh: Santino Marella (w/Beth Phoenix) came out and talked smack about his three possible opponents at Cyber Sunda; Roddy Piper, Goldust, and the Honky Tonk Man (all former Intercontinental champions). Santino invited Johnny Knoxville into the ring and asked him what he was thinking when he made fun of the Great Khali. Knoxville said it was no big deal, he just asked him about his tally whacker (penis). Knoxville then made a joke, which implied that Beth Phoenix was a man. Phoenix slapped Knoxville across the face and gave him the most severely botched body-slam of all time. Hornswoggle showed up and gave Knoxville a Tad-pole Splash! Knoxville’s buddy entered the ring and Big Dick Johnson came down and stripped, which led to the buddy stripping (his gimmick from Jackass). Then suddenly the Boogeyman (I didn’t even think he still had a job!) showed up and spit worms in the Knoxville’s buddy’s mouth. Knoxville got on the microphone and said it didn’t go too bad, but then suddenly the Great Khali showed up in the ring. Knoxville wisely tried to make peace, but the Great Khali grabbed him by the head and gave him a massive Tree-slam! The funny thing was on the reply they would not show Beth’s botched body slam and said “it all started with Hornswoggle’s Tad-pole Splash.

Cryme Tyme (Shad Gaspard & JTG) & Kelly Kelly defeated John Morrison & Mike Mizanin & Jillian Hall, :

C.M. Punk defeated World Heavyweight champion Chris Jericho with help from special guest referee Batista: Before the match, Batista came up on the big screen and said that he forgot to mention that he would be the special guest referee. Late in the match, Chris Jericho had the match won but Batista pretended like he had something in his eye. Jericho mouthed off to Batista so Batista gave him a Batista-bomb. C.M. Punk covered up and scored the 1-2-3 to win the match (but how can he feel good about a win like that?)